Oh it is so difficult to disengage, and SD19 isn't even here. But she will be in 2 months, if she doesn't show up this week. She wants to see SD13, so that tells me she is back in town from vacationing with her college friend. I guess you can only be a leech for so long. All I can do is wait, but it is killing me. I like to plan ahead, I like to know what course of action to take. I certainly don't want to come home Friday evening before DH and find a hedgehog in my home, even for just a few hours while the SDs visit.

The hedgehog dilemma is making me sick!

Little things happen when SD19 is here and the behavior is appalling. SD19 is so defiant. No, not all of the time, but when DH DOES ask something of her, she gets pissed easily. He asked her to take the trash out of her room, didn't follow through, so I did. This was at the end of January. She had venom flying from her lips when I calmly told her that she needed to remove the trash from her room. DH tried to calmly talk her down, as he stuck up for me and told her to grow up.

Then she threw things at the closed door with DH in her room, so I could hear it out in the hallway. I wanted her gone from the house that instant, but you give these disrespectful ODDs ammo and they throw it at you, full force. But being quiet won't solve the problem. Sure, it won't give her ammo "in the moment" if I can keep my cool and not say a word, even leave the room and let DH deal with it. But then the problem remains......The Skid gets her way. I have spoken to DH about SD19 going back to therapy so she can control her angry outbursts and gain some control. But what it comes down to is.....THIS IS MY HOME and DH's HOME! SD19 is merely a toxic "guest" a few months out of the year.

What in God's name do I do if DH doesn't step up the next time? Call the police to remove her? Then my marriage goes to shit! The littlest bit of ammo you give her, she shoots back, all guns blazing. It's over stupid shit, which makes me wonder if I'm losing my mind.

Then she went back to school and bought that damn hedgehog a week later in early February. My stomach is in knots because I don't know how to keep my cool with such a defiant POS teen. She even disrespects DH, and that REALLY pisses me off. Yet, DH insists that she's his daughter, while I insist that she is toxic and gets along with no one unless there's something in it for her.

I don't want to sacrifice my home for a POS 19yo. I just won't. I am the adult homeowner, she is the child visitor.

What do I do? I am so pissed at being pissed, I can't see straight. Oh and DH is out of town tonight for business. SD13 hasn't been a problem. Just same old space cadet. I told her earlier I would shower and she could take one after dinner if she needed to. Well, it's an hour until bedtime and she "forgot" again. No signs of life between her ears to remind her to shower and Aunt Flo is here this week. I'm not saying anything. It's funny at this point. Pathetically funny.

Same shit, different week. This is ridiculous! I just want my DH back the way it used to be! I want these skids gone! I want my life back already. I am not who I used to be. Not at all, and it sucks. Big time.

~ Blue Moon