Lazy is as lazy does!
So obvious tonight where SD15 gets her laziness from! One of our dogs got sick on the carpet. I'm in my office doing some financial aid paperwork, when I hear DH and SD15 arguing over who will clean the mess. Seriously? I finally hear SD15 say, "So I have to clean it!" with as much attitude as she could muster!
Now, those of you with these teenagers we talk about on this board know how half-assed they do things! In a flash in my mind I see SD15 use towels which she will never clean...just throw them away. Then, just sprinkle a little water on the spot and call it clean, because she doesn't feel like looking for the carpet cleaner under the sink! I see this huge stain on my carpet!
So, before she can get started on it (because she is slow as hell), I get up to go clean it. DH asked what I'm doing, and I tell him, "Really? You should be doing it as you KNOW she will never clean it up right!" At first he just sits there while I get the dust pan and pooper scoop to clean up the mess without mashing it into the carpet. It isn't until I'm gagging that DH offers to help! At this point, I'm just mad, and finish the job.
I was already mad before this! SD15 asked DH for $30 so she could go to the OPTIONAL band banquet. He told her, without consulting me, that he would get her the money. Luck for me, he forgot to get it on the way home, and I found out about it when SD15 asked him in front of me if he got her money! I let him have it, right there in front of SD15 so she would get the message, too! Before he tells tells her she can have things, he needs to check with me if it is in the budget! We have things we need NOW (like $250 worth of propane), and, no, there is not room for the money for the banquet! I'm later going to point out that if SD15 did ANYTHING to contribute around the house, that may be different! However, EVERY Sunday, the boyfriend has to come to church with us, and he brings no money for the regular Starbucks run or lunch (and I should not have to give up because he is with us), and DH always insists we buy for him! There is also the very recent $70 dress that she still easily forget about when she is asked to do something...oh, and she still hasn't worked off all that makeup! I'm literally tired of the "gimme gimme" and then you get crap if you ask her to do something as simple as pick up her own crap!
Oh...and SD15 didn't make color guard officer...thank goodness! That explains Friday (she wasn't sick...she was depressed she didn't get what she wanted and was being Miss Drama). I've also noticed that she has been on a binge this week (food-wise)...typical when she loses something like this. Then, there was the trouble this past weekend...all typical stuff when she doesn't get her way with something this big!
LOL...if that would mean
LOL...if that would mean cleaning it up again!
SD15's argument was that it isn't her dog. Of course, under that argument, then DH really should have cleaned it up, because he always claims the dog his (the cats are mine, and I'm the one taking care of BD23's dog according to DH...BD23's dog is with us until she can afford to rent a house). But yeah, there are just some things you don't ask a spoiled teenager to do, and this was one of them! It's like dusting, sweeping, or vacuuming...if you are gonna have to go behind them and redo it, just do it yourself! "But they need to learn!" They already know how to do it right...they are just too lazy!
DH ended up telling SD15 to
DH ended up telling SD15 to ask BM for the money! That should go over really well! I see her texting DH, cussing him out for not giving SD15 the $30...going on and on how we have so much more money than they do (we...as in me...as DH has nothing left over after his share, SD15 actual needs, and his expenses). Sorry lady...I take care of mine, you take care of yours! I gotta son going to college! BM doesn't pay a dime of child support, so the least she can do is find $30 for the banquet!
And the way SD15 put it to DH, she wanted to "borrow" $30. Tell me, how do you borrow money with no means of ever paying it back?
I'm happy she didn't make guard officer! I know it sounds mean, but she wanted it for the wrong reason! The squad needs to be led by girls who truly want the squad to do well...not because they want control or the "captain's solo" (which were the reasons SD15 wanted it...she said this herself).
It just makes you resentful
It just makes you resentful that they contribute nothing and take everything they can get. My skids do the same thing, it's "can you buy me x,y,and z" but if I ask them to clean the messes THEY make I get attitude. If you want the financial benefits of this family, you need to help out in this house! So irritating. I would have never dreamed of sitting on the couch and watching my mother clean around me as I lay on my butt. Lazy.
When I was a teenager, if I
When I was a teenager, if I needed to ask for money like that, and I wanted any HOPE of mom saying yes, I knew I had to do something like clean the living room (dust, vacuum, etc.) or something outside of my normal chore list that I knew mom would notice the moment she walked into the door before I even asked. Of course, I would get something like, "The living room looks nice. What do you want?" from mom when she saw it. But, at least it sent the message that I understood give and take...you can't just take, take, take without giving anything.
Not just SD15, but I think kids these days in general are getting more "gimmie gimmie". I hate to see when they have to go work! "What do you mean I'm ONLY getting minimum wage! I work my butt off!" Yeah, work your butt off getting orders wrong, doing a half-assed cleaning job on those tables, etc. If they lift one finger, they are working their butts off! Like SD15's excuses for falling asleep at 6 p.m. in the evenings..."I've had to do A LOT of stuff this week!" Oh, so you went to school 7am-3pm, sat in some classes, didn't see any homework EVER, you did no chores, came home and fell asleep on the couch every day this week, left your crap all over the TV room...this was after sleeping most of Saturday, and all of Sunday afternoon. Yeah...really hard life! Try working 10 hours a day (and that is a short day), dealing with people who ALL think their stuff is more important than everyone else's...pulling you in every direction and yelling at you because they just need someone to yell at. Oh, and let's not forget the other departments making mistakes that affect you terribly, causing you to have to do work outside of business hours, and all they can say is "Oopsie!" Then, when the work day is over (if it ever is), you have meetings at school, laundry, dinner to cook, dishes, grocery shopping to do, bills to pay, paperwork to get done for one of your kids to go to college, studying to do because you are so tired of your career you are ready for something new, and at some point, you try your darnedest to get some exercise in because that actually is your "me time", etc. Oh, and your boss just told you today that you have to work the next two weekends, so you are looking at 19 days straight with NO day off! But what does it matter, because when you do have a "day off", you have a nice long list of things you didn't have time to get done during the week in your 19 waking hours per day (yes, only counting 5 for sleep here)! Yeah, princess...you did a whole lot this week!
Sorry for the rant, but that is seriously what is going through my mind when SD15 claims she has had a tough day! Then there is DH! Yes, I get that he also works, and doesn't get to work from home like myself. What HE doesn't get is that because I have no commute, that seems to mean to management that I have more time to work, hence, the part of my day that I have to do actual work is longer than his. He tries to minimize my job all the time because I get to "work from home"...dude, I do the same amount of thinking and arguing, etc...I just don't drive to the office! And there are many days I miss my commute...I didn't look at the commute as a curse! I would blast the music, open the sun roof, wind down, and have some alone time without anyone asking anything of me! But here is the real difference...DH comes home and plants his butt in front of the TV, while I'm still doing all the other crap on my list above! All the while, I make more money than he does...seriously more money! And he has the nerve to tell SD15 that she can have things without consulting me? The one who really ends up paying for all of the extras in this house? Oh no he didn't!!!
So I don't know if it is so much a feeling of resentment, or that feeling one feels when someone just stepped on your face (i.e., feeling walked all over...taken advantage of)! BM? She does NOTHING! She is a stay at home "mom" with a live in babysitter to take care of her younger child! Her big decision of the day? "Do I say in bed ALL day, or do I move to the couch at some point?" Her husband the the live-in babysitter do all the work!