I will always be way involved. I don't know how people back off. I will never treat my children differently whether I gave birth to them or not. I am raising a family not separating one. I always make sure to never make the bm feel threatened. my husband has a great relationship with my ex in order to make sure our children get the best. I don't know why anyone would want less for any child or want any child to be left out. There are a few that agree with me and want their children whether step or bio get the best. And I am not saying bm or bio parents can't always provide the best but sometimes stepparents do it better. That is facts of life. I will always be involved I will always treat my sd like I am one of the people raising her. Not some person who doesn't have time to make sure she is getting the best possible care whether it comes from her bio parents or stepparents. Coparenting involves everyone including step and bio. That is why I constantly make sure that there is no parent left out. I am just asking is there any stepparent that actually wants to coparent and do the best for their child or everyone so obsessed with being the "step" parent and trying to back off and not be part of the raising.

Children need to be treated and loved the same. They need to know that they have a united front working for them and their best interest not creating some rift because people are saying they didn't give birth to them so they shouldn't be involved.
My husband and I have always been a strong united front and we are going to continue to do our part and reach out to the other parents because our children deserve that. not parents who pick and chose when to be involved and not involved. give me a break people either you are helping raise a child or you aren't part of that child's life. being involved is being a parent whether you put biological or step in front of that word it is the same thing. You are a parent. You are helping mold a child.

I get how it might be harder when the child is older and they are just meeting you but I have been in my step daughters life since she was three and I will continue to do my part which is the primary care giver, provider, soccer mom, dance mom,the parent that does her homework every night and checks over her folder every morning. I am that mom whether step or bio. I do the same for my biological daughter as well as my biological son. There is no difference in how I treat them or raise them. Other than they all have different personalities.