In a previous relationship, my ex had primary physical custody of his son and the BM had primary physical of the daughter. I don't think the courts typically separate siblings, but with the arrangement they had, the kids were together every weekend. I guess it worked all right for them, but never did bother to ask why they did it that way. I know no one paid support the way it was arranged.

My youngest SD lives with us, but her sisters actually have their own apartment and don't live with BM (they're in their 20's now). I will say I've certainly heard of that before though, where one child lives with mom and one with dad - especially as they hit teen years and can express their preference. How old are they? If they're teens, or almost, it's not that uncommon for one child to choose to live with the other parent.

What are their ages? Are they at a point that the legal system would let them make that choice? In my home, if BM could get her act together...SS would definitly be living with her, his choice and ours, but of course BM doesn't want him alone because then there is no CS from DH. She only wants custody if both children come back to live with her.

We have this. SD18 lives with BM full time, no set visitation at all with DH. Same thing here for SS15. He sees BM once every 6 weeks for dinner. DH sees SD about the same. THe Siblings have no relationship at all. SD picked on SS, so he pretty much is indifferent to her existence.

This all went down when SD turned 14. SS had it with the situation and when it looked like SD was leaving, SS sued BM at 12 to live here and BM didn't fight it. She did get EOWE until he turned 14. Then she has nothing confirmed, it is up to the kids now if they see the other parent. SD18 one week now and we do not anticipate much relationship anymore and that is great for me. She is too much drama.

I've seen this with divorced parents. A couple of families actually...boys went to live with dad when they became teens, girls stayed with mom. BUT neither parents ever remarried (their both dating now and everyone gets together sometimes for big holidays!) and the parents lived in the same neighborhood. Like, the kids could go to either parents' house whenever...but primarily were split.

Probably the reason this happened here is there has never been CS for the kids from either side and BM never really wanted to be a parent and SS really wanted stability and SD didn't so she is with the parent that lets her do what she wants.

Sad thing is these siblings have nothing to do with each other.

“Be careful what you wish for in this world, for if you wish hard enough you are sure to get it. I once heard a very wise man say this, and the longer I live the more firmly I believe it to be true.”

Sarah Orne Jewett, The Atlantic monthly, Volume 67. 1891.