I'm glad that you have taken this step (not glad that you were placed in a position that you had to).

I agree that people need to protect themselves and their wishes and it's a shame when one cannot trust their own spouse to do so.

Neither of my ungrateful SD's will get anything, of DH's or mine, per DH's wishes. Our house will be TOD to our niece, which I know DH will not change should I happen to die first.

Ah, Miss T, a weekend to yourself. That sounds delicious.

My DH is clammoring to go see his kids. Unfortunately, he can no longer make that drive himself. It's 12 hours and age sucks. He knows I hate the drive and the "visiting" and he said he'd look into flights, for one or both of us. So far he hasn't done that. Eh, not my problem. I don't understand why his kids don't come to see their old Dad. I much prefer that. Our house is big enough and I can manufacture work emergencies pretty easily to make it doable. And they are respectful houseguests.

I need to look into a trust. I'm on the verge of retiring and need to take a look at updating our wills anyway.

I need to look into a trust to make sure the investment property I own goes into a trust for my two kids and not to DH who would then split it with his 3 kids.

The house we live in was owned by a widow who outlived her husband by 20+ years. She owned 2 properties, one used to be her sister's and they were both bought by their mother, so this was family wealth that predated her husband. Neither one had any living children but the woman had a stepson. After she died the houses went up for sale and the belongings were auctioned. We got it for a steal. The proceeds went to a local charity. 

Until the stepson begin lurking around. You see he thought the house was going to be his. In the few times he drove by and wanted to chat you could tell he was quite pissed about how everything had gone down and kept asking about all these items and remarking on the size of the estate (over a million). It was almost as if he was asking us to give him something. 

What you want.  Only in divorce it will become an issue. Not in death. 
Divorce you have community property,  what property, money were made, save during the marriage, That get split equally. 

Great news - you get a 3 day pamper-fest :D 

I too am thinking of this, as Im getting older and have no kids of my own, and dont want too much trouble with things if Husband were to pre-decease me. We have the house as a joint tenancy with right of survivorship. But there are some cars and personal items. Bank accounts, etc.

I would build into the trust that the property is inspected on a schedule and with random no call inspections and that your DH is liable for the repair of any damage caused to the property if you pre-decease him and he resides in the property under the terms of the trust.

I am a licensed insurance adjuster and have had claims from property owners whose SKids destroyed their rental property or home that the Skid was living in.  If your DH is not capable of keeping  his spawn under control, I suspect that he is not capable of protecting your property from his ill bred spawn either.

Though not the same situation, my SS (adopted at his request when he was 22) is the sole heir and beneficiary of our estate if we go out together or when the last of either his mom or I pass.   He gets it all.  In one of two formats.  If he has completed a Bachelor's degree from an accredited institution he gets it immediately, if he has not yet completed his degree it goes into a trust for him that will pay for his education and base living costs if he is a full time student in good standing with his school.  The trust dissolves and he takes control of the estate upon completion of his degree or age 40 whichever is first.

Kind of our way of parenting from beyond the grave if necessary.

It has always been my plan to put everything I own in trust to DS when he turns 18. Right now my will leaves my brother as the executer and everything goes to him to manage for DS. 

I would never change a thing or let SDs get their grubby paws in anything I have worked for. I plan in leaving them with what they came into my life with and that is nothing. 

I'd either of them choose to magically appear back into our lives as adults. I can live with the fact that SO will accept them with open arms. But that doesn't mean that I have to. 

My house is in a trust.  Right now I have it so SO can remain a year before it's sold (if I die) but am altering it this year to give him lifetime use.  He must be living in the house full time or it gets sold.

Sorry Bratty McBratFace but you won't inherit your self-declared 'familial home' (that she lived in one flipping summer).  Or frankly any other assets from me at all because we are doing a pre-nup prior to our marriage next year.