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SD20 fails midterm and fdh calls me mean

goincrazy.com's picture

SD20 partied all weekend got so wasted she had to be carried out of the club apparently, was so hungover saturday she got home at 8 pm and went to bed. She failed her midterm yesterday, came home crying and says she has test anxiety and she studied and failed and doesn't know what to do bc she tries so hard....... :?

FDH feels so bad for her and offered to watch her kids after he gets off work so she can retake the test

I say to him " How about instead of partying all weekend and being so worried about getting wasted and dumping her kids off, she worry about studying and her school work instead of waiting until sunday-the day before to study, Then maybe she wouldn't have failed??????"

FDH said I'm MEAN!!!!!! :jawdrop:

Really??? I'm mean for saying that?

Wow, this is common sense that really isn't so common to FDH and SD20- apple doesn't fall far from the tree?????

Anyoone who has been through some college knows that unless you really have your shit straight, midterms and finals is NOT the time to party and get wasted right before your test esp when you don't know what the hell you are doing. Duh

ugh, I'm surrounded by idiots

goincrazy.com's picture

OMG, I would have a coronary. Thank God we aren't paying for her college, She's a single mom of two so she gets financial aid...We pay all living expenses and support her and her two kids

goincrazy.com's picture

To be fair FDH pays all of our living expenses. I don't contribute to any of the bills or mortgage.........

goincrazy.com's picture

But yes, FDH pays her way she lives rent free, gets everything for free and her kids live with us too- hence the name goincrazy Smile

goincrazy.com's picture

yup its true. I work full time and pay all my own bills, pay off some debt etc. So to sd20 she views us as equals bc daddy is paying all the bills.......FDH offered, this was the deal moving in. He never expected anything from me, it's quite frustrating bc I'm just the girlfriend I just try to keep to myself and not get involved. I could choke FDH though

goincrazy.com's picture

I had to say something to him!!!! He's yapping about how bad he feels for her? I don't want to hear it....This is bullshit.

I really do need to get away, everytime he offers to watch the kids, I enjoy alone and quiet time in my room or I ge my nails done or meet girlfriends for dinner. I make sure I'm not around. He offers, he can watch them.

Her mom works and NEVER watches the kids. And the kids dad is a heroin addict and now meth addict as well, in and out of jail. Robs people and steals as of lately. His family takes the kids about once a week- usually while she's in class.

RedWingsFan's picture

^^^^^^^^THIS!!!! He's definitely enabling her behavior and you're paying the price for it.

goincrazy.com's picture

YES 2 kids by the age of 19...........winner!!!

I'm so frustrated, I hung up on fdh. No, its not the most mature thing to do but I could not stand to hear another word about how sorry he felt for her. He is an enabler and I cannot stand it. I WISH I kept my own apartment daily bullshit like this is REALLY getting to me. My 1 hour therapy session next week is not going to be enough

goincrazy.com's picture

LOL good idea, this is true. Haha, he would know it's the calm before the storm- he would be scared }:)

Nana2's picture

My SD couldn't even make it in college. We knew if we tried to let her go she'd flunk everything, so we suggested the Army as a way to get her education and a good career. She agreed. Yippeeeee. Boot camp here she comes. Attitude, mouth and all. LOL. I hope they straighten her out. DH was with me on this one and I'm glad he has more up there than doing what she does. He's got the brains, she didn't. She must take after her mama. LOL And that ain't me!!!! Yippee!!!!

Sorry you have to put up with what you're putting up with. Wishing you the best in your effort to combat with SD and DH.

CailinSM's picture

I know exacly what you mean... I don't think you were mean at all... my SD was expelled from one college because basically she kept signing up for classes then never showing up or would stop going half way through etc... she was so stupid she wouldn't even drop out before the refund date and literally wasted her entire pre paid college fund with only a few credits to show.. she waits until the very last minute to do anything, does the bare minimum to squeak by and copies from other students etc... she barely passes most of her classes and has failed or dropped out of many more... now she is insisting it is because she has ADHD and a learning disability... uhmm ok.. she has never been diagnosed and when she did try to get diagnosed they told her she didn't... she lied to DH and told him she did get diagnosed and that the classes were waived, but that is BS, the doctor wouldn't diagnose her, so she didn't get the letter, and now the classes are on the back burner until she can figure out what to do... That will be fun... I'm no doctor but I diagnose her with "lazyness" lol...

Nana2's picture

Hey CalinSM, do we have the same child? LOL Sounds like what mine would do or did in High School. LOL

goincrazy.com's picture

And I would just like to add that she is NOT a fulltime student. She goes to school mondays and wednesdays ONLY and works 3-4 hours a week. Thats right, 1 evening a week. She sits on her lazy ass and does nothing.

Of course, FDH struggled when he was in college too so he thinks it's too hard for her :sick: .......WELL GUESS WHAT?? WHEN YOU ARE ALLOWED TO DROP OUT OF HIGHSCHOOL IN 11TH GRADE BC YOU ARE PREGNANT AND DON'T GET YOUR GED UNTIL LAST SUMMER, COLLEGE MIGHT NEED A LITTLE EFFORT

:? they make me feel like I'm the crazy one bc they have the same way of thinking- FDH was NOT coddled or brought up this way. He was earning money and giving it to his parents at the age of 14, where did these entitled little bitches come from????

forgotten wife's picture

i think the fathers of these SD's need to realize that, if you keep treating them like they're children, they'll keep acting like children.

Texas_Pete's picture

I hope your house has some extra bedrooms.. If im not mistaken,, the grants stop if GPA drops below a certain level.