Questions: How do you think adult skids should go about handling their insecurities about their lives, and the step-situations they're in? For those who are adult SKs, how did you go about it?

I went about it by getting professional help, and by talking with both of my parents. I also attempted to get to know my stepmother by inviting her out for coffee. She accepted the invite, but never showed. I slept better knowing I did the right thing by extending an olive branch. If she wants a relationship with me, the ball's now in her court. I got to know my stepdad. He and I have may common interests and I think the world of him.

There were some sad times in my life back then. I'd just put my old dog to sleep, and had broken up with a BF. Those two instances really compounded the insecurities I had about my step situation. My parents could tell I was devastated. They asked me, "honey, is everything ok?" I wound up in tears, telling them each about my sadness over my dog and ex, and my insecurities about the step situation. I don't know of any good, loving parent who wouldn't want to help their child, kid or adult. I don't know of any loving parent who sees that their child, kid or adult, is sad and doesn't ask about what's going on and offer help. Most parents I know of adult kids would want to help them by giving them advice on how to deal with their insecurities on anything including these step situations. They recognize, however, that those with these step-situations insecurities can express them without bashing the stepparent. Smart adult stepkids realize this too. I got a lot further in getting help and support from my parents by focusing on discussing the problems *I* had, than I would have by bashing their spouses.