Memberships
I've a question for you stepparents out there:
On membership applications, if you belong to any organizations or facilities, etc....as a blended family, that the BM (or BF) does not also belong to, where it asks for "Parent" or "Guardian" or "Adult 1 in household"- do you all put your name and your spouse's name for the adults in the household? Or do you put BM/BF's name, because they are the skids' bio. parents, even though they are not on the account? BM is having a crisis, because she thinks that because DH and I have our names down on our YMCA membership papers as adults at our address paying from our bank account and living with our blended family of children- that I am trying to masquerade as her kids' mom. (Even though I have, loud and clear, STEPMOTHER after my name, her as emergency contact with BIOLOGICAL MOTHER on both of her kids' sheets.
Has anyone else encountered this issue?
LOL, Ignored! Thank you for
LOL, Ignored! Thank you for taking the time to answer. Surprisingly, our BM is not a SAHM. She actually works ridiculous hours and I don't know from whom she gets advice....or if she is just so miserable that she thinks of these things on her own....
Thank you for your take. It seems to me like a huge *non*-issue. She wants it documented at the Y that if something happens to the skids while they (and I) are at the Y, SHE will be notified first- even if I may be on the premises. Go figure. She's, I guess, one of those BMs who is so bitter and spiteful that it doesn't make her happy that her kids have another person in their lives who loves them.
I put my name down in the
I put my name down in the family section, and add that I am stepmom somehow. I add BM as emergency contact, only so she can't say something in court. I am the custodial SM, and I spend more time with the kids than either bioparent does. If BM wants to get her panties in a wad over it, she can go screw herself. It's her own fault that, because of her neglect and emotional/educational/mental abuse of her children, she lost custody in the first place.
Ignore the BM and don't give in to her BS. If you're doing nothing wrong, you shouldn't have to worry.
If I/we are paying for a
If I/we are paying for a family membership - it's in my name and DH's name - skids, and dd's are added as children. We do not write down STEP PARENT - we don't/didn't have a membership that asked for emergency contact. If we did we would have used DH - since we were NCP we shouldn't include them on any membership we got since most asked for household children or only include the one that we got to claim on taxes.
If she has/had a problem with it. I could have left them off, and we could have done those things WITHOUT her kids. That would have been an option.
If you have them, you are the
If you have them, you are the parents during that time, enough said. Let her get her own Y Membership and add the Skids. I would not even acknowledge her foolishness. What if you're in an accident at your home, or in the car? She needs to pray about it and leave you guys alone. She's probably jealous that you guys have the more intact family and she does not. She sould be glad you take the skids with you to the Y.