What to do when BM refusing to pay her percentage of costs?
A couple of weeks ago, BM announced to DH that she voluntarily left her job with a realty company to persue realty on her own, then subseqently annouced that "she now has no income" and that "the child support will have to be refigured". (Tho he pays her a hefty alimony and 67% of the CSO) She hasn't informed him of any modifications she's persuing yet or anything and is whinging about not being able to pay her percentage back to him of clothing/medical expenses, etc, and how awful things were at her job and needs "validation" on why she left.
Aside from documenting everything, keeping reciepts, etc, what can we expect as she moves forward? The next step should be arbitration according to their agreements.
How sympathetic can the system be to a parent who left her job voluntarily, refuses to pay her percentages (that DH pays her to pay him back with) and has a hefty alimony to boot? What can DH expect or prepare to do as this moves forward?
Well, if it's a dad, zero
Well, if it's a dad, zero sympathy.
If it's mom, nothing but sympathy.
When we got custody of SD, BM quit her 60K year job to avoid CS. XH was actually ordered to continue paying her.
Now, if HE had done that??
Agreed. BM didn't have a job
Agreed. BM didn't have a job while SS lived here, and there was no problem with that. DH doesn't have a job now (in school) and did they refuse to lower it based on his last 3 jobs here ($10-11/hr - what he could make here if he worked), but they said they would impute MY wages if he continued. Sigh.
That is not going to fly.
That is not going to fly. People cannot voluntarily quit their jobs, claim no income and then get a mod. It doesn't work for NCP dads, it shouldn't work for the opposite gender either. If she doesn't pay you will have to file contempt on her for nonpayment.
Oh goodness, SAF, I'm sorry
Oh goodness, SAF, I'm sorry
Yup. Of ALL the ways I
Yup. Of ALL the ways I thought THAT court hearing could have gone, that one didn't even land on my radar.
I was pretty pissed. (Understatement.) BM moved out of state, so we *also* got to pay for airfare to send SD to her every month.
PLUS pay CS.
Life just ain't fair.
So, your hubby was ordered to
So, your hubby was ordered to make up the difference and pay more because BM left her job, or are you saying the child support stayed the same? Is he paying the full child support obligation?
His order was dropped to $500
His order was dropped to $500 a month. He got FT, and BM had 48 hours a month of visitation. Previous orders were $650 a month and he had 1 day a week and EOWe.
He paid that until he vanished off the planet when he and I divorced. I kept SD (BM didn't want her back), and I told her I wasn't paying CS. I told her that I thought she should pay ME CS and actually support her daughter for the first time - ever. No dice.
To say I'm jaded when it comes to family court is an understatement.
Yup. While that part sucked,
Yup. While that part sucked, the having to pay CS while having full custody part still rubs me the wrong way.
And of course he provided health insurance.
SD is grown now. Her dad is still gone. Her relationship with her mother is still sketchy as best. And she has decided to follow in my footsteps professionally, pursuing the same degrees.
Some states have a 'potential
Some states have a 'potential to earn' rule.
So your BM has a 'potential to earn' X dollars a year based on her past employment history - she can't quit her job and claim 0 since it was her choice to leave, she should be considered earning whatever that 'potential to earn' amount is and CS is calculated on that.
Please correct me or add info if others have experience with this ..
i've been told that here in
i've been told that here in AZ, that is the case too - that she should be imputed a wage from, maybe, her last three years of employment.
I'm concerned how often the courts cater to the sympathy Card?
So, he gives her like 2 grand a month. She's basically lying when she says she "has no income" so shouldn't her FIRST obligation be the legal court order and, like, maybe call her mortgage company to negotiate rather than expecting DH to negotiate?
At the very least, you would
At the very least, you would think he could modify to withhold the amount from alimony...couldn't he??
I know when our BM got a Contempt of Court fine (measly $500) and didn't pay within the time allowed by the courts, my DH just started subtracting his half of the skids' medical costs until he got to the $500 she was supposed to pay him.
Good point, MisSTEP, but the
Good point, MisSTEP, but the alimony, by it's design, is non-negotiable until it's end. So, but he does pay her a per-diem fee when she takes the kids on ROFR on his time when he goes out of town on business. Would it look bad to anyone legally if he went ahead and subtracted her due amount from that? He's a bit leary of doing that as it might make him look bad to the legal system too. Maybe it's just a nitpick to the court system, as long as the monetary obligations are squared away to each other?
Alimony and CS are two
Alimony and CS are two totally different things. Alimony will be used as income in her case. He may be subtracting the amount of CS from alimony. My coworker in a NCP mom and "her child support" comes out of her portion of her ex's military retirement.
OMG..that has to be the same
OMG..that has to be the same BM! Every week we hear a sob story where she is telling her kids "she could lose her job next week". And yep of course no payment of the dentist bills.