what's in a name?
Every time I think I am all alone in my feelings, I come to Steptalk and find out if I am really alone...usually not. Here is my question today? Does the sound of your skids name make your skin crawl? I have the same reaction to hearing BM's name or skid's name, and I always found my gut reaction very interesting from a psychological viewpoint. BM I can understand given what she was put BF and I through over the course of our relationship. I literally cannot say her name and NEVER do, and when I hear that name, refering to another person who happens to share the name, I just cringe from my toes to my hair tips. I refer to "her" or "the ex" or "his mother" or most likely "the psycho bitch," but I cannot make myself say her name. I could more easily cough up a razor blade than have her name come from my mouth. Weirder is that I have the same issue with the skid who lives in my house 50% of the time. He is "the kid" or "him" and once in awhile I cannot avoid it and have to refer to him by name and it almost physically hurts. I figure this is a psychological defense or denial mechanism. Almost like if I don't utter his name, he doesn't exist. If he has no name, he has no importance. In reality, he is the highlight of my BFs life and his everything, so I guess my brain is trying to create a more proper balance by not naming him. Things with names are important and I don't want him to exist at all, so by not uttering his name.... I know, totally weird and I am probably am not expressing this phenomenon very well...but does it feel familiar to anyone else?
I hate my BM's name - the
I hate my BM's name - the woman in charge at my DD daycare has the same name and it kills me to say her name - I am so F______ing annoyed at our BM right now that I hate everything about her - lol
I don't see anything so wrong
I don't see anything so wrong with this... I do this too, referring to SD & BS...They are his children & usually when referred to in that manner pissing me off, therefore, his responsibility to deal with.
"I always say to my SO...YOUR kids, YOUR children....I know I know....its bad...I cant help it."
I don't have a problem with
I don't have a problem with the SDs names, we get along great. I never say BM's name, though. When talking with the SDs I say "your mom." When DH and I are talking and the skids are there, we say "her first name." However, when the kids aren't there, that's a different story }:) }:)
Yes! Lol, I am so happy you
Yes! Lol, I am so happy you wrote this because I feel the EXACT same way....I never say BM's name, neither does DH. We have other names for her. As far as SD goes, I really don't like to say her name either. I usually call refer to her as "the child." I think I really can't stomach to refer to her by her name because her name is the one that I have always wanted to name a baby if I had a girl. Now obviously that isn't going to happen.
I like skids names. BM's
I like skids names. BM's name makes me sick, which is unfortunate because she has a very common name. Skids names are unique and pretty. However, I do not like the way one of the names is spelled. I wish I could change the spelling.
FDH & I also do not say BM's
FDH & I also do not say BM's name .. she's SS7's mother. I don't have any issue with SS's name, I do however physically have that cringing feeling when I see anything of his laying around. Except for eow when he's @ our house I keep his bedroom door closed ... kinda like out of site, out of mind. And it makes me feel sick when I go to the basement and find his sweater or socks lying around. 1. because that means that yet again he didn't clean up after himself. 2. It's like he's invading my space all over again & he's not even here!
Once again, these feelings
Once again, these feelings are only "natural" to us...
DH never will say its name. I think it makes his skin crawl worse than mine actually.