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Ways to Make Pregnancy Easier...

sunshinex's picture

Hi everyone

So I've posted before about this, but about 2 months ago I had a miscarriage. We've finally started trying again, and I'm sure it'll happen quick because it did the first time around, so I'm kind of starting to get nervous. The thing is, pregnancy is REALLY rough on me. I know it's rough on everyone, but even my husband has mentioned that I seem to get much more moody (and crazy) than he's ever seen. I actually think I have a bit of post-baby depression or something. I'm nervous because I work a really, really fast-paced job where I'm the most depended on person in the company. I run a team of consultants and everyone looks to me, but when i'm pregnant, I can barely stay awake let alone run a team.

I know I'll have to keep working throughout my entire pregnancy because even taking maternity leave for a few weeks after birth will be hard on everyone else, especially clients. So my question is, what can I do to make pregnancy easier? How can I feel less tired without coffee? How can I minimize the mood swings? Last time I was pregnant, I got into an argument with my husband while we were packing our house and ended up throwing boxes everywhere and yelling lol. I know it's hard on my husband but quite honestly, it's harder on me! It sucks feeling like your mood impacts the entire household AND an unborn baby and yet I can never control it.

It also doesn't help that I have to quit smoking asap, which makes it a bit harder because I'll be dealing with that plus hormones on top of it. I had many moments of "I'm just going to get a divorce I hate this man anyways" where my mom had to talk me down and remind me that I'm just hormonal. I genuinely felt like my marriage was going to be ruined last time I was pregnant. I'm not really sure what to do, but I guess I'm just looking for anyone's tips or ideas to help me calm down a bit and hopefully make the experience a bit nicer for everyone involved. This would be my first baby, third pregnancy.

Thank you!!

uofarkchick's picture

Unless you're experiencing some sort of psychosis, you do have some control over how you speak to people. Pregnancy does not excuse throwing things at your partner or yelling at them. If it were the other way around and your husband did that to you, we'd be telling you to leave him.

Pregnancy, for most women, is not a disabling experience. You sound like you're expecting this to be horrible. Try thinking positive.

You may also want to ask your OB/GYN about taking an anti-depressant. They do prescribe them to pregnant women if they are at risk for PPD.

Keep your girlfriends on speed dial and go out with them once in a while to blow off steam. My friends were my biggest helpers during my first pregnancy. They understood my fears and would listen to me complain.

sunshinex's picture

Ahh, I didn't throw anything at him, just around the room. And it could be possible that it's more than typical hormones. I do struggle with depression and mental illness runs in my family. It's not like, totally awful or anything, but it's difficult to control. I will definitely talk to an OB about taking an anti-depressant of some sort, because I would really like it to be an enjoyable experience. Most of the time, it's not so bad, but every once in a while I go into hormonal overload and feel miserable.

uofarkchick's picture

Throwing things period is no bueno, chica. If you have to throw something, do it in private.

Thumper's picture

Stop using hormones as a reason / excuse to be nasty to anyone.

30 years ago we had to control ourselves AND we did. Crappy mean behavior was not ok. We figured it out....

sunshinex's picture

I'm definitely not using hormones as an excuse... I'm trying to find ways to avoid getting overly moody because I DON'T want to be mean to anyone.

sunshinex's picture

Oh I'm so happy to hear someone else went through that!!! I spent my entire last pregnancy (only 8 weeks though) thinking my husband was the most annoying, offputting thing on earth. Everything he did was like... gross to me! It was the worst. We laugh about it now, but I really hope it's not that way this time around. Good to know it stopped as time went on though Smile

But yeah, I will definitely be looking into therapy before we find out i'm pregnant. We also have access to my parents house (they're gone for the winter) I can go to and be alone whenever I get overly moody, so I think that'll be nice.

still learning's picture

You're going to have to take better care of yourself. Simplify your lifestyle and work part time and/or from home some days. It sounds like you're overworked and could delegate tasks out. Let co workers take on some of your clients and trust others to make good business decisions rather than you shouldering all the burden. Your team would likely appreciate the autonomy.

Eat healthy, lots of greens, stay hydrated. Do light exercise and gentle stretches. Take your prenatal vitamins. Put yourself first, work can wait.