Should married people go on vaca without their SO?
Last year, I went on a 5 day trip with my mom. My DH wasn’t really happy about it- I’m not sure if he just didn’t like the fact that I left him alone for a week or what.. I don’t think he wanted to go because he doesn’t really like spending a lot of time with my mom (which I get.. in-laws are in-laws).. & I really don’t think he was worried about me cheating on him or anything like that.
Anyway, my mom and I want to go on another trip this year (maybe not for a full week this time, but I am thinking more like a long weekend). The reason I don’t want to bring DH along is because I don’t want my mom to feel like third wheel. My dad passed away a few years ago so it would just be the 3 of us.
I spend every day with DH and we go on vacations too. I don’t think he should make me feel guilty about going away with my mom every once in a while (we’re talking like once a year). What do you think?
I agree with you, but my
I agree with you, but my husband has reacted in the same way in the past. Maybe get to the bottom of why he feels this way and then you can compromise?
My BFF and I used to have our
My BFF and I used to have our annual girls vacay, but sadly DH put a stop to it.
I guess he didn't like the idea of his wife on a tropical island partying with her single friend....
But if I was going with my mother, I don't think he would have a problem with it. I guess it depends on the destination and who's going.
It would just be my mom and
It would just be my mom and I, same as last year.
I know, my 2 single girlfriends keep talking about doing a girl's trip & in my head I'm like "yeah right" because I know DH would NEVER go for that. EVER.
Dear god yes they should. I
Dear god yes they should.
I love my DH. Really.
But there are seriously times I just need to be ALONE.
So once a year I ship him and the skids out of state for him to go visit his mom!! 7-10 days of B.L.I.S.S.F.U.L peace and quiet!!
Yes, I can understand why he
Yes, I can understand why he wouldn't want me going to have a girl's weekend with my single friends & I would not want him going for a weekend with his friends either. I wouldn't have an issue if he went on a hunting/fishing trip with his dad, though.
I always try to plan my time away from home around when SD is there because 1. I need to get away from her lol and 2. I know DH doesn't want to be alone. Last year when I went away with my mom, it was a skid week so DH did not actually spend any time alone. SD was there the whole time. & we have no kids together so it's not like I'm leaving him with the kids.
Idk. I definitely do plan on going away with my mom again. I guess I can shorten the time (a long weekend opposed to a full week) and hopefully DH won't bitch too much.
Why don't you try and plan it
Why don't you try and plan it so he has something to do (hunt,fish, etc) while you go with your mom? That way he isn't left out of a vacation and feeling resentful. I would be resentful to be left at home while my DH went on a vacation without me.
Well we have SD all week so
Well we have SD all week so he would have her there.. I planned our trip last year when SD would be with DH so he wouldn't be alone, but maybe that is why he was resentful because he had to sit home with her while I was on vaca.. Hmm.. I thought I was being nice by planning it while SD was there but I guess I can see why he would be upset!
I would probably be resentful too if DH went on vaca without me. I guess I just see it as he has his kid there, so I'm going to go spend time with my family.. Thanks for the input!
Yes I am and it's going to be
Yes I am and it's going to be a vacation for me, not for anyone else. Sorry but my EX brother stated that I should always be with my ex no matter where I go. Sorry but that sounds like insecurity to me.
I'm going hopefully on vacation next Spring out west to see friends and to get away from where I live. Party central...you bet!!
My dh encouraged me to go to
My dh encouraged me to go to Vegas with my mom and some of her friends last year. I don't think he'd have a problem with me going anywhere with anyone-I just don't want to!
My dh regularly travels without me. He has done camping weekends with buddies, mission trips, retreats, spent a week in Florida with the youth group-I love it! I tell everyone he can go as much as he wants to. He's home every day so I like the little break and if he goes without the kids it gives me some great one on one time with them as well. Now, if he told me he wanted to go to a bachelor party in Vegas-I might not be too keen on that.
I get more vacation than DH
I get more vacation than DH does, so he encourages me to go without him. That said- I just don't want to. I'd miss him if I were somewhere tropical and beachy. We love to explore new places together, so I'd probably piss everyone off by saying, "oh DH would love this..." I end up taking a lot of long weekends in the summer to use up my vacation time.
He does overnighters with the boys about 4x a year- there are 6 of them, 3 married and/or committed relationships. 3 Single. I have to scold him to stop texting me while he is with them, LOL.
I see nothing wrong with it- just whatever feels right.
Oh yes, that's the other
Oh yes, that's the other thing- I also get a lot more vaca time than DH does. I get 4 weeks and he only gets 1. We normally do a week-long vaca together, along with other weekend trips.
I honestly don't think he would want to go on vaca with my mom and me anyway lol just like I wouldn't want to go on vaca with him and my in-laws.
There are some places I don't want to go without him- like you said- I wouldn't want to go out of country or anywhere tropical because those are once in a lifetime experiences and I would miss him and want him there.
Ugh yes, my DH has a friend
Ugh yes, my DH has a friend like that. He's not married but he is in a relationship & is constantly cheating on his gf. I hate DH being around him!
I see no problem with it -
I see no problem with it - however I already have 3 week at a time apart from DH so if I do something I do it when he is at work whether it be a girls weekend, or going to see family. I agree I wouldn't go anywhere exotic probably without him. Though I do think alone time is good I feel like sometimes we get to much of it.
Sometimes when he is home however he will go on mainly day trips with the guys or a late night hunt but he doesn't like spending that much time apart as our time together is already limited. I don't think I would see a issue with it though.
"Should" married folks go on
"Should" married folks go on vacay without each other? I think that depends on the couple and what they're comfortable with.
DH and I already have pretty limited time together, so I can't imagine doing this. I can't imagine he would ever want to either. But I guess if your circumstances are different, and both parties are okay with it, then it's fine.
I think the issue comes in when husband and wife don't view solo vacations the same way. If it were something I knew bothered my DH, this wouldn't be something I would fight him on. It's just not that important to me.