Pick up location question
Question for all of you....DH has joint custody of his daughter. Original custody agreement states child is to be picked up at a specific date/time. DH and I both work. DH is trying to get a new custody agreement as the current one is difficult, was made when she was an infant. In the meantime DH asked BM to pick up daughter at his parents house. It is about 12 miles out of town, same county. BM has picked up at DH's parents before with no complaint. Now she is refusing. Saying daughter needs to be picked up at our home at the specific time as this address is the address on the paperwork. Now, after reading the custody agreement it says nothing specific about WHERE the child is to be picked up. Just when. Is the address implied? Can she refuse to go get her? (Grandparents are not able to take her home this time.) Now BM is picking up 3 hours early and threatening to file contempt papers because DH isn't following the written order.
Thanks for your time.
You don't win with a lunatic
You don't win with a lunatic like that. If it's not in the CO, then she can suck it up and pick up her kids, or she can skip visitation. It sounds like she's just trying to be difficult. Don't let her, because next time she will be worse...give them an inch and they take a mile.
SD is at grandparents over
SD is at grandparents over night only when there is no school the next day. BM doesn't work. MAJOR GOLDEN UTERUS . . .
DH is calling FOC today just to clarify if he is in the wrong.
fiance's used to say all
fiance's used to say all PU/DO done by father and it was implied that it was at the mother's residence. we now have all PU/DO done at the local police station since going to the house was no longer working out for a variety of reasons and a neutral location was a must.
I agree that BM is being
I agree that BM is being difficult. I think COs should be written "child needs to be available for pickup at XYZ time" so the parent who wants to see their child will go to any location (grandparents, restaurants, police station, etc.) Also location needs to be itentified in advance to allow the time to get there on time.
I think it's ridiculous if child was over an hour or more away, and I know some people would take child far away to be a jerk just to make other parent drive. But, I know my DH would go however far necessary to pick up SD, that's what good parents do.
As far as your case, I'm curious why it's a problem for BM to pick up 3 hrs early if the child isnt even spending the time with DH?
Hopefully you and DH can get a new order soon that works better with your work schedule s!
BM doesn't even do the
BM doesn't even do the picking up. She makes her new hubby do it. EVERY.TIME.
BM doesn't leave her house.
This woman is a nightmare.
DH would drive as far as he had to, no question. Not BM.
@steplife...what it comes
@steplife...what it comes down to is BM is not getting her way. She has to get out of her warm cozy bed to get her child.
She is all about what the child wants when it suits her, BM.
I was saying that child needs
I was saying that child needs to be available for pickup for parent A/B at the scheduled CO time. But the location could be varied. We have said "We are going to be at the mall, but you can pickup SD here at 6pm" BM has also done the same "We will be at restaurant xyz at 6pm so you can get SD here". It's always at least 2-3hrs in advance which is plenty of time to get there by 6pm. We live in the same city as BM about 30miles apart. So that could be a difference.
My point is, if you want to see your child you will make your plans work to get there no matter how far.
I didn't mention anything about a 3rd party doing the pickup. But SF and I also pickup, so limiting to parent A/B doesn't work for us.
I guess I was confused about BM picking up. I thought she was getting out of "warm cozy bed" to pick up Skid 3 hrs early from grandparents. So it seemed like you were saying she is refusing to pickup kid, but really she is actually picking her up its just early.
I think your BM is an idiot though if she is really filing for contempt because if she is claiming Skid is not at specific address, DH can argue that he provided location of Skid and skid is available for pickup at CO time. I don't think a judge will view 12 miles as unreasonable. Also if she is picking up Skid early she is also violating CO and should be charged with contempt if she wants to play that game.