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Im so frustrated

Someoneelse's picture

Submitted by Someoneelse on Tue, 01/19/2021 - 8:59am

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OMG! Im so freaking stressed out! Saturday my DD17 took SD15 and DD16 to the mall for a sister date.  How sweet, right?  Well all day yesterday (DH went out of town and i was left to stay with all the kids) sd was joking about how "bad of a driver" DD17 is. Im sorry most (not all) teenagers suck at driving. Then, DD17  jokes and tugs her hair lightly (i was in the room, saw it can attest that it was a light tug, but i still told her not to EVER do that again) SD15 hauls off and hits her as HARD as she could, leaving a big red mark. DDwas so surprisedn as she thought they were having a teasing bonding moment, so i know she honestly had no intentions of hurting SD. I was the one who had to deal with talking to SD about her laying hands like that on my daughter, and keep my cool.  

That night i couldn't sleep at all due to my anxiety...

Today after DH tok sd home,DD16 comes and tells me that on Saturday the entire time they were at the mall SD kept saying that their sister date would be sho much better if DD17 weren't there, and that DD17 is just a 3rd wheel. DH said "they just joke around too much take it too far" to which i responded,  "from now on, when SD is here, you need to be home, and DD17 will no longer be taking sd anywhere." He didn't say anything back to this. 

I swear to God, if either of them ask me or DD to drive SD anywhere im gonna lose my cool.

Dogmom1321's picture

Submitted by Dogmom1321 on Tue, 01/19/2021 - 1:14pm

Yes! If DH is going to be out of town, then he needs to make alternate arrangements... that DON'T involve you. Period. 

Someoneelse's picture

Submitted by Someoneelse on Tue, 01/19/2021 - 2:19pm

I had thought, it's just going to be the morning, SD is 15 and SHOULD be able to take care of herself.  I don't need to babysit her, she can feed and entertain herself, and hopefully stay out of trouble... apparently i was wrong... i really shouldn't have to put up with that. 

 

What sucks is by DD17 has crippling depression and has previously had suicidal tendencies because she feels so out of place and that nobody likes her... she knows it isn't true now, but she takes meds and sees a psychiatrist and psychologist. But sd treating her line this REALLY can make her spiral downward back into those types of thoughts. 

advice.only2's picture

Submitted by advice.only2 on Tue, 01/19/2021 - 3:18pm

You are too kind, I would have called the cops for assault and let the little sh*t see what reality is when she decides to haul off and hit somebody with brutal intent.
I would also let DD17 know she's under no obligation ever to take that garbage anywhere ever again.

Someoneelse's picture

Submitted by Someoneelse on Wed, 01/20/2021 - 1:55pm

Thanks, my kindness is definitely taken advantage of.  Growing up, i had to be kind or i was whooped.  I got whooped a lot.  I don't know how to stand up for myself.  And i hope my children learn better. They are also very kind though.  I told my daughter later, if SD puts a hand on you, hit her back (my daughter was in marital arts and can hit pretty hard .