Family vacation???
We just discussed going to a water park for two days as a family vacation this summer. During the week, so it wouldn't be so crowded,...so I would be taking off work.
FDH just springs on me this morning , after I requested off, that he wants his 22 year old sister to go with us too, so that his 3 kids cam all have an adult to split off with and go on different rides with,.....
1, why are wer going on a family vacation if you want us to split up?
2, his sister doesn't like me, thinks I'm too hard on the kids. On several occasions has said so. Even ignores me when I say hi to her. FDH had even had a conversation with her using the words "this isn't high school, you have a problem you come to me about it"
FDH thinks this will "help" our relationship and she might open up to me.
I told him, no way do I want to be stuck in a car, stuck in a hotel room with her when she barely even acknowledges me.
I don't blame you. I
I don't blame you. I wouldn't want her to go either.
How old are the skids? Our skids mostly like the same rides and activities at ages 5 and 7, so sticking together isn't a problem. I could see how older skids might not find all the same things interesting. An amusement park isn't really an ideal place for "quality family time" in my mind when older kids are involved .. it just doesn't seem unreasonable for people to want to split up.
I would absolutely nix the idea of the sister coming no matter what .. if DH won't budge on the idea, then maybe you guys will need to find a different family vacation idea.
The kids are 12, 10, and
The kids are 12, 10, and 8....girl boy girl
I used to go to the pool by
I used to go to the pool by myself when I was 12. But then of course I knew how to swim and was not a helpless imbecile like so many skids.
These are not toddlers that need to be watched literally every second by an adult. I could understand (not the splitting up) by the safety concerns if there were three toddlers at the pool.
Agreed. I know times are
Agreed. I know times are different now, but at 12yo I was given a time and place to meet my parents and set loose in the amusement parks.
Let DH, the kids, and the
Let DH, the kids, and the sister go. You stay home and go get a relaxing massage.
^^^^ THIS!! It was wrong of
^^^^ THIS!! It was wrong of your DH to invite his sister along without running it by you first, especially when the sister treats you like crap. Sounds like he needs to be taught a lesson! That doesn't sound like a very fun vacation to me anyway.. he wants to split up and leave you alone running after a skid in an amusement park? No thanks, I'd pass lol go do something for yourself!
Another thought I had was why
Another thought I had was why should you be responsible for taking one of HIS kids off on your own? IMHO a family vacation is that, a family vacation. There is no need to split off. It's not like the kids are 2, 10 and 18, where they all will want to be doing all kinds of different things.
I thought of that too. My
I thought of that too. My vacation as well,... But I get stuck taking the kid around who, honestly would be the one who didn't get tp be with daddy and didn't get to be with the cool young aunt... The kid left with me would hate that they were left with me....
I see your point about
I see your point about wanting to hang out as a family, and I'm sorry your SIL is acting like a teen in high school towards you.
My DH are taking SD to an instate amusement park as well for a summer vacation.
We thought about taking her to another park out of state, close to a dear friend of ours who has a DD close to SDs age. Our original plan was so that SD & friends DD would have someone to ride the kiddy rides (SD doesnt like roller coasters or anything "too scary") and each adult could take a turn watching the kids while the other two went and rode a roller coaster (of course this wouldn't be the entire park visit though).
But in the end that plan it didn't work out.
With that said, I definitely agree with you and think since it is a FAMILY vacation the family should stick together. And if your DH doesn't agree with that, then say your staying home and going to pamper yourself and have some "me time".
"family" vacations in our
"family" vacations in our house means me, my kids, his, his kids and sometimes his mom. it certainly would not include someone who has been rude to me. it's no longer a vacation if that happens. as far as mending a rift, that has to be done via an appology and has nothing to do with spending time together. the spending time together occurs AFTER the appology. have you received one?
No I have not received an
No I have not received an appology. She has gown to the point where she will one word answer me when around family.....
Her sister, FDH other younger sister is 32 and started behaving that way towards me first....and she still treats me like I'm invisible so I don't see the younger one stopping any time soon if her older sister is still doing it
poor thing. since your fdh
poor thing. since your fdh won't protect you and actually wants to provide his sis with opportunities to be rude to you, protect yourself. tell him no, and if he persists, don't go. i hope your fdh will put your feelings first. if he doesn't in this (comparatively minor) situation, he's setting a precedent to getting you used to being treated like shit, and accepting of it. don't let him.