I kind of know what is going on but I am having a hard time finding the right words to describe it, to talk to DH about it. He is already very bad at communicating and talking about things, especially when it comes to the skids.

DH has 3 g-kids.

OSD has 2 kids (18 months & 6 months). She lives out of state. She has lived out of state majority of the time that I have been with DH (almost 4 years). Her and DH rarely communicate. Their relationship and how they maintain it is weird to me. OSD goes on and on about how much she loves her dad, but doesnt maintain contact with him. Same for DH. OSD doesn't like me even though she has only spent about 1 hour with me. She gets her opinion of me from YSD, MSD and BM. T

DH has seen OSD's kids a total of 3 times for a total of maybe 1 hour.

MSD19 has a boy who is almost 2. He was born premature and in the hospital for about 3 months. DH would go and see him on his lunch breaks when he was in the hospital. I have no idea how his relationship is with GB because I am disengaged from MSD and ask nothing about her or GB to DH and he offers nothing to me about them.

MSD and I have a horrible relationship. She's a thief, manipulator, con and every other nasty word.

I tell DH that she is an adult, she has her own place and DH can visit her and GB at MSD's place. I am not going to be disrespected in my own home or have to worry about my stuff being stolen. It has been like this for almost 3 years. There have been a time here and there that MSD has been over, but its rare.

When DH first found out he was going to be a Grandpa I figured that relationship would be the same as he is as a Dad. Very hands off. Not really the "Grandpa" type. The few times I have seen him with his g-kids it seems very awkward. DH is a half ass parent. He thinks just being there or providing financial support is enough. He isn't very engaging, etc.

So my niece (who I am very close with) is pregnant. I am beyond excited. Initially I wasn't because she is only 19 and I was heartbroken but now I am excited.

I plan on being very active with the baby. My niece's baby is the first baby in our family in almost 10 years.

Here is the problem.

DH has made comments when I have talked about my niece's baby and having the baby over to the house and being very involved with the baby DH says "My grand kids should be here."

Last night he even went as far as to say that the baby isn't going to be here as much as I want, because his g-kids can't be here.

Its not that his g-kids cant be here, just their moms. LOL.

Well OSD isnt even in this state and when she does come to to our state she visits DH for all of 15 minutes, long enough to get money from him and then she doesnt visit him the rest of the time that he is.

DH is more then welcome to bring MSD's son over if he wanted to visit with him in our home. Keep him overnight, etc. But he doesn't. And he wouldn't because he wouldn't want to actually take care of the GB.

I'm annoyed that DH seems to have an issue with my niece's baby being over, when that has nothing to do with my relationship with his kids.

I obviously have no issues with his g-kids. He is more then aware of the reasons behind the shitty relationship with his kids. I've done all I can do and it is what it is.

I dont know if he is worried that MSD or OSD is going to get jealous that the new baby is at the house more or what and think the DH is more involved with the new baby because she will be here more then his g-kids are. DH isnt even involved with his own kids or g-kids. I doubt he is going to have any kind of real relationship with the new baby.

I dont even expect DH to have anything to do with the baby when the baby is here. Just like he doesnt when my niece comes over. We do our own thing.

It will definitely be a new "role" for me and something he isnt used to. A baby being over.

I'm not really sure what is behind his comments and his reactions to the situation. Especially since the baby isnt even here yet.

I want to talk to him about it. I know its more then just my niece's baby being over. I know it comes down to MY relationship with his kids and his g-kids.

Thoughts?