Things collapsing quickly. BM filed for bankruptcy.
I posted a few days ago about DHs crappy bonus and how we would now go to court to decrease CS and try to get out of private school obligation. Well today we learn:
SS17 got very little financial aid to his private college, the total bill will still be over $50k. BM can only contribute $5. But she still wants him to go. Doesn't like the public college.
BM declared bankruptcy in November. She cannot qualify to consign any student loans. She claims to DH she doesn't think she can live on less support.
I am just shaking my head at the folly of it all. DH says without loans SS17 cannot afford even a state school at this point. We will pay half a state school tuition but we will not consign loans. This is a hill to die on for me. DH wants to talk about us consigning.
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I thought most private loans
I thought most private loans required a consigned since SS17 has no income or collateral. If I'm wrong that would be great! One less fight with DH!
If the kid defaults then the
If the kid defaults then the government will come after you- you can kiss your tax return and possibly your house goodbye. Federal loans are NOT dischargeable in bankruptcy- basically the only way you can walk away is if you became VERY disabled or die. I had student loans and I will never cosign.
Neither did mine. I applied
Neither did mine. I applied for them on my own through my school financial aid office before the semester started and they disbursed my money just like it was a scholarship before school. My parents have nothing to do with paying it back. They were against me getting it in the first place (I used it for Summer school in Europe and didn't necessarily NEED to take the courses).
I dont understand how a judge can force you to pay for your skid to go to private college when neither parent can physically afford it? BM needs to either put up or shut up.
If there is a cosinger they
If there is a cosinger they will come after you and private loans have no way out- there are people who cosigned and their kids died and they are still having to pay.
HRNYC do you happen to know
HRNYC do you happen to know limit? This is very helpful thanks!
The limit is estimated by the
The limit is estimated by the the "need" the student shows through filing out FASFA.
I did not cosign for my
I did not cosign for my daughter to go to college.
Why is she filing for bankruptcy?
And nothing wrong with a state school. Those who file bankruptcy should not be dissing state school. what a joke!
Ok good then maybe no one
Ok good then maybe no one will need to consign!
She filed because she insists on sending four kids to private school even though her income and DHs can't support it. She makes six figures plus CS but believes her children should never be denied anything. Ever.
State school is great. I agree!
I agree. We contribute
I agree. We contribute virtually nothing to retirement. DH has gone into debt. All to pay stepkids private schools. Now we are of erring half a state school tuition. To cosign loans would be just to go into more debt. I refuse. We've done enough. Not our fault BM can't afford the other half. She made this bed.
I attended community college
I attended community college for four semesters and then transferred to a private school to finish- it was cheaper for me to go out of state private than attend my local four year university because of the significantly better financial aid package.
SS17 needs a dose of reality.
SS17 needs a dose of reality. STAT!
Hold on - SS doesn't know
Hold on - SS doesn't know about DH salary cut it just happened and we are waiting until after Christmas. And we only learned about BM today so I think he has no idea.
My issue here is not SS but BM!
My concerns would be if there
My concerns would be if there is more than one kid then what ever you do for the eldest you will be expected to do similarly for the rest. Make sure whatever you agree to is affordable for all of the kids when their time comes.
Yes DH filed yesterday to
Yes DH filed yesterday to decrease support and end private school. That was before we knew about BMs bankruptcy. He hoped they would be able to work together to come up with a plan, but I knew better.
Your BM has some nerve to say
Your BM has some nerve to say that public college isn't good enough considering she can't afford to pay for it. That's quite aggravating. My BM is the same way. She makes minimum wage working part time, but then asks my husband to pay for all of these expensive activities for SD. She has also said that certain things weren't good enough for her or SD, yet she's essentially trailer trash. It's so frustrating.
Your SS also sounds very entitled to think that even though his parents can't afford it, he should still get to go to private college.
This would absolutely be a hill to die on for me as well. I don't blame you one bit.
The kid needs a long talk
The kid needs a long talk with DH. If he wants to go to private college, he will have to figure out how to pay. I am currently getting my MSN, having completed my BSN, both in state schools. Between I worked for one of the biggest hospitals in the country - they did not like the students from the big private, prestige school or some of the other private schools in the area, and chose the state school students (at least in the dept I was in). As students do clinicals they see them in the work field and the managers felt the students from the private school often acted entitled and did not want to get their hands dirty. Additionally, they felt the private schools let in anyone who wanted to pay, so state schools had a reputation as being like a pre-selection process. Nursing may be a little different, and I am certainly painting with broad strokes here, but private school does not necessarily mean much these days!
When applying to law school in the UK, I had an issue with my undergrad being from a non-Oxbridge school so perhaps it depends on the major and there are different considerations depending on career path, but getting in debt for a name is crazy.
Finally, I currently go to school and work for the school as a grad assistant - as I am from the UK I do not qualify for aid, but the 20 hours I work teaching undergrads writes off my entire tuition and I get paid. There are undergrad assistants too. There are options other than loans.
Thanks cactus! I found the
Thanks cactus! I found the records online. Thank you so much for telling me this!
Do not cosign. Yes, it's a
Do not cosign. Yes, it's a hill to die on. Kid should do what every other kid does without a scholarship (maybe shoulda worked harder on those grades at the time????) and whose parents can't foot the bill: work through college. Many of us have. He'll survive.