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What nerve. Do your skids do this?

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:09pm

So SS came to visit for about a week. He spent some time here and time with BM. (about 2 hour drive apart)

BM and DH were going to meet half way to let SS come back with DH. They meet about 15 minutes away from a boardwalk. (restaurants, games, rides, aquariums ect. on the water).

This is the following text convo between SS and DH before meeting.

SS: Dad, we need to meet on board walk and make a day of it. Ride some rides eat lunch and just hang out there all day.
DH: Probably not. I have to get back to do blablabla.
SS: Aww come on. Mom already agreed to stay there all day with us. It can just be us three for the day at the boardwalk.
DH: No son I have to do blablabla.
SS: I don't know why you can't do this one thing for me. It would mean SOOO much to be able to hang out with you two together.
DH: No son, I have to do blablabla.

Then SS got pissed and would not answer DHs text the rest of the day. lol

A few things...
1). SS has ALWAYS done this. He tried to get them to go on a Hawaii vacation with him a few years ago. Plus plenty of other crap over the years.

2). Note that DH has always told SS no. BUUUUT he has told him that he had other things to do, or did not have the money. Never did he say... "No SS, I am remarried, your mom is remarried and we divorced almost 20 years ago. We do not NEED to hang out together. Especially for a grown ass man."

DH did tell me that he put SS in his place about that mess after he went and picked him up. I am sure he said something, but I am sure it was not forceful enough to get any point across.

I just wonder...Do your teenage/grown skids try and get their parents together all the time?

Comments

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:17pm

He is in the military so he is only down a few times a year. He is way to cheap to rent a car so he relies on mommy and daddy to do ALL driving.

Edit to add...DH did mention that SS needs to rent a car next time. Want to bet that SS will say he can't because he is broke, then DH will run out and rent the car.

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

Submitted by not2sureimsanea... on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:22pm

Jeebus, mary, and chosuf. What the heck? I feel like we should all get together and make a dictionary of crazy. Like, Smelly-(noun) a subset of insanity that not only involves the warping of past events but the systematic attempt to bring the surrounding people into that mentality.

not2sureimsaneanymore's picture

Submitted by not2sureimsanea... on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:18pm

Wow. Okay, has your DH ever sat him down and straight up told him he was no longer with BM and it is highly disrespectful to their current partners (if BM has one) to even request that. Part of breaking up/divorcing someone means you don't do things you would be doing with your family, and "hanging out" together is unhealthy in terms of boundaries.

If he's never given him this talk, it's high time he does it.

zerostepdrama's picture

Submitted by zerostepdrama on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:20pm

My skids would not. They know how much DH hates BM.

I am a COD and I would not. Like Never. It would never occur to me.

When my dad and SM go to our hometown and I go to see them (kind half way from where we both live) they always invite my mom to wherever they are staying (hotel, camping, etc) so that my sister and I and the grandkids and all the grandparents can be together. It's actually really nice. But my mom is NOTHING like the crazy BM and she gets along well with my SM and dad.

Lillian23's picture

Submitted by Lillian23 on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:24pm

My parents were never married, split up before my mom even knew she was pregnant, but THE LAST thing I would ever, ever ask is for them to spend time with me, just the three of us. Good GOD no.

Tuff Noogies's picture

Submitted by Tuff Noogies on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 12:26pm

ewwww. like zero said, as a c.o.d. myself never in my wildest dreams would that thought have ever occurred to me.

Willow2010's picture

Submitted by Willow2010 on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 1:05pm

Yes...it has always freaked me out a little. It freaks me out more that DH would not take a stand for so many years. He said he "talked" to him about it this past time but I am sure I know how that "talk" went.

You all know the talk .... "SS, I can't hang out with you and your mom because it upsets Willow." lol

I would actually flip my shit if I found out he said that.

IamexhaustedSM's picture

Submitted by IamexhaustedSM on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 1:57pm

My DD and ExH have NEVER tried anything remotely like this.

My skids have on numerous occasions told DH that he HAD to talk to BM, he HAD to have a relationship with BM cause that is what God would want. They told him he has to talk to BM, he had to be friends with BM. All this was said to DH right after they spent time with BM especially right before our wedding.

BM would try to use scripture from the bible to back her up but she would never refer to the scriptures that spoke of cheating lying spouses that committed adultery.

http://www.snarksquad.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/11/areyoufuckingkiddin...

hereiam's picture

Submitted by hereiam on Fri, 04/03/2015 - 2:30pm

Oh God, no. SD knows better than that. She knew better than that when she was a child, much less now that she's an adult.

Seriously, what the hell is wrong with your SS? And your DH giving him the excuses he does, like if he didn't have anything else to do, he would be game. He actually told SS "probably not"? Probably? More like, "no way in hell is that ever happening".

Your SS should be old enough and smart enough to know better but your DH sure does not help the situation.