B. Used to be me till I disengaged. Now it's all him. We have 50/50 custody.

A.. I tried to be D but then I "am just like his BM and abandoned him..." :sick:

B. dh is a good father. i would engage, but i just dont handle certain things the way dh does, and while he's made some improvements, he doesnt quite have the hang of "back each other up even if u dont agree, then discuss it in private."

the way i would handle things would require staying more on top of things and following through relentlessly. for dh, "it's just easier if i do it myself". well ok then!

so even tho' we have them fulltime, DH does take care of them much more because that's his choice on how he wants it handled (not due to lack of care or support).

D

It was A until I told DSO that he needed to quit working and get welfare assistance to get his own place WITH his brats.

DH does it all...I do very little and we have full custody of SS15. BM only sees him about every other month for dinner. I only make dinner and wash the clothes. DH and SS are very self-sufficient.

Biofather I made SO responsible for his kids from day one, partially because of this site (I researched step parenting once we became serious I wasn't getting screwed) He had said he wanted sole custody or bare minimum 50/50. I was clear if that's what HE wanted HE was the parent and HE would do all the work. I support him, he has to ask me to watch his kids and if I say no he is not allowed to get pissed it's my right to say no. I don't expect him to parent my kids and they can watch themselves. He chose to try and parent with me though I repeatedly tell him I'll handle things as he just gets pissy that he does for my kids where I don't for his, so I remind him he shouldn't then.

For the regular, day-to-day stuff, my DW takes care of SS. For things like dentist/doctor appointments, taxiing him back and forth between homes/friend's houses, help with special school projects etc. That would be me.

ETA: I guess that would make my answer a C?

C. - We have 50/50 of my 2 and his 1. We have been together almost 10 years and our youngest 2 are 10 years old. We have raised them as a family. Whoever is there, whoever is available.... takes care of whatever needs to be taken care of. We both cook, clean, help with homework, discipline, reward, teach, comfort, love and care for all 3 kids.