I am so glad I found this site! I really had started to believe that I was a heartless evil monster because of the feelings I have had towards my 2ss 10 and almost 14. And the feelings I have toward my 2bd's sm. I think just being able to express my feelings and get them off my chest may be therapy for me...I have been married (#2) for almost 2 years and I can not stand my 2 ss! Or their bm! I have lost all hope of ever having a real family. My husband gives total control of when, where and how the boys spend time with us. Which results in him being a taxi and a babysitter.