and were successful. Granted, BM doesn't have to pay us as much as we paid her, but at least it's still something.

We are CPs of the SDs but weren't initially. BM's folks pay us her CS. You can go after BM for CS in court and be successful, but you need documentation of how much it costs you to raise SD.

Yeah we went after BM from the get go, during divorce. She pays us CS monthly (of course owes us a ton!). It is possible. Look into family and children services for your state.

and after all the work I put in it is now garnished from her paychecks every month. she still owes us 2 years of back support but I'm working on getting her taxes garnished for that.

My husband did go after her for money (it was just for her share bills she was supposed to reimburse him for regarding my SD) he wrote a letter to the prosecuting attorney and they must have looked into her CS status and that's why this past Feb she had to explain why she wasn't or hasn't been paying CS. My husband and BM have a follow-up next month on June 5th. My husband tried asking if BM could pay extra money towards her arrears rather than just the extra $5 per week along with the weekly support payment. They told my husband that right now she needs to get her feet wet with her job. That made me mad because she can't hold a job for to long. So far as far as I know she still has the same job going on 3 months now. I do plan to push my husband and ask again for BM to pay a larger amount. Now, I have a screen shot of BM telling people she receives alimony from her ex-husband. With that being said if I my husband uses it it may backfire on us in terms of her possibly wanting custody of my SD later on.

How I see it is if she wants to "claim" poor fine, we will go off that and say SD shouldn't live with you due to your history or employment and it shouldn't be taken into consideration that her boyfriend pays all the bills. But on the other hand she is receiving money that should rightfully be going towards child support also. But I also have this info as well from the same conversation....she isn't supposed to be receiving it anymore either but she won't say anything (see she isn't honest, she is a money grubber)because she feels since he put her through hell then it's her "right" to get it until they realize she shouldn't receive it any longer!

I am stuck like a rock in a hard place on that aspect. What I would like to do if anyone can help me is report her to whoever handles the alimony she gets from her ex who is in the military but I wouldn't know where to report her too!

In our state it doesn't seem to matter they strictly look at the numbers. The have a formula of how much time is spent by each parent, income of both parents and out comes a dollar amount. I believe that if you make a child you need to be responsible but then CS really needs to be spent on the kids and accounted for but there is no way that would ever change.

BM tried to play the "I have no money card" and it didn't work during the financial discovery. She purposely doesn't go to work to get state aid for medical even though she has a great plan with very little out of pocket. She even neglected to tell DH about the medicaid so he would have to pay out of pocket while for almost 3 years she didn't have to.

BM didn't plan on DH hiring a d*ck of an attorney and the amount is almost $20k more then what she originally reported.

BM played this out too long and now she is going to end up paying DH around $700 for 2 kids because she ran out of money to keep fighting and she started this mess to begin with. The kids know that a settlement is coming and are way too happy about their new arrangements!

In our case, it took nearly a year for the state to finally garnish her wages, but we finally started seeing some CS. At least for a few months. H received sole custody of SD in Sept of 2007. CS didn't start up until August of 2008. He started receiving regular payments in October of 2008 but those stopped in mid-Janunary of this year.

She is currently in arrearages for over $4K. That doesn't count her half of the therapy bills for SD not covered by insurance. That's another $800.

To top all of this off, we are going back to court soon to transfer custody of SD back to BM. We're not sure if the state is going to continue to garnish her wages while H pays CS to BM. Or if the state will have him not pay CS until BM's arrearages are at a zero balance. Hearing is 7/28. Either way is fine with us.

Go after BM for support. In this state, CS is calculated by the amount of overnights spent with each parent and amount of income. It's her child and she should be supporting her children no matter what. Trust me.....if the situation we're reversed the BM would be screaming to high heaven about not getting CS paid ASAP.

Good luck!

Never eat more than you can lift.
Miss Piggy

first to comment on how difficult it is for a Father, either CP or NCP, to receive justice from our Family Court system as far as fair CS payment or receipt levels.

In my SS's BioDad's case he has yet to get what he wants as far as reduction of CS levels that he owes for my SS. Even as he has added ever increasing numbers of out-of-wedlock spawn in an attempt to get his CS obligations lowered.

In your situation I would for sure do everything possible to nail BM to the wall on CS. Men who are found not worthy of CP status get nailed, women who are not worthy of CP status should be held to the same level of financial accountability commensurate with earning potential.

Best regards,