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BM is suddenly a lot better of a parent...I think this change happened since I had my son.

SteppingUp's picture

Submitted by SteppingUp on Tue, 06/07/2011 - 9:25am

Haven't had a whole lot of complaints about BM lately...atleast none that affect the skids. Sure, she goes out every single weeknight she doesn't have the skids but really that isn't our business since it's her free nights...just amazes us that she has the money to spend. But this past weekend she actually took the skids all by herself to a hotel out of town that had a water park. We thought for sure she brought along a boy toy, but we found out it was just BM and her two kids. I almost pooped myself out of surprise.

She also suddenly spent a ton of money on clothes for the skids...and get this, they're APPROPRIATE clothes! She's bought flip flops for SS3 for the past two summers and he can hardly walk in them -- this time she bought him the type that have the strap on the back. And SD6 has a slew of new shoes that are conducive to running and playing in, not high heels! I'm seriously in shock. And she even took the skids to a few community events for children in the past month or so (she has NEVER done that).

This change has totally happened just in the past few months, and my son is only 14 weeks old. I truly think that me and FDH having a baby kind of jump-started her "mommyness"...better late than never, I guess. I think she probably feels bad that my little one gets to have a stable house with 2 parents and her kids don't, so maybe she's trying to compensate by being a more involved mother. Or maybe she realizes she's got some "competition" since I'm a mom now and realizes the kids will see how I am with my child... well whatever the reason, I'm glad for it. The skids deserve to have a loving mother who WANTS to hang out with them and be involved...not the old BM who shipped them off to grandma's every chance she got so she could go out with her friends.

Let's hope it stays this way!

Comments

SteppingUp's picture

Submitted by SteppingUp on Tue, 06/07/2011 - 12:19pm

Yep, when I showed up she did this too and within a few months was her usual self-absorbed self. So I guess I'm just going to cross my fingers that it lasts a good amount of time before she grows tired of "trying" to be a good mom. Because it certainly doesn't come naturally for her.

Hopingforthebest's picture

Submitted by Hopingforthebest on Tue, 06/07/2011 - 12:37pm

Our BM has been pretty good lately, but I feel its due to her new BF ...could also be our soon to be new BS (I'm due next month) Could be a combo of both, not really sure. Up until about 6 months ago both SS's would alternate with texts/calls asking Dad to come get them/want to come home on their w/e visits with mom. But lately they have been coming back happy and that makes us happy because she must be trying to spend some kind of quality time. It also corresponded with the beginnings of DHs filing for more C/S so I think that plays a part also as she now is on a campaign to get oldest SS to come and live with her next school year...

Elea's picture

Submitted by Elea on Sun, 11/28/2021 - 12:39am

I told a family member how much of a loser BM is, always pawning high school age SK's off on whoever will take them, even when they ask to go back to her she never wants them, especially on major holidays, Christmas, Thanksgiving, birthdays etc... She says she needs "alone time" to write in her journal and other equally lame, self involved activities. Aforementioned family member went straight over and shamed BM. Low and behold, all of a sudden for the first time ever, BM allowed teen SK's to go back to her house when they asked. Now when I need a change or went to send BM a message I just tell this family member and she goes right over to blab to BM. Apparently BM cares so much about what other people think of her and is so insecure with her own choices that all it takes is a good shaming for her to shape up.