I think School may 'get it' now
SS4's IEP meeting was a success for the most part! And BM didn't melt down - mainly because she didn't really understand what happened.
FDH said the BM showed up unprepared as usual while he was ready to go with his list of questions/concerns, folder and note book in hand. The School staff had read the reports that FDH proved them and refereed to them often during the meeting, BM gave them funny looks - not really sure what they were referring to. Should we have told her that we provided them? Probably BTW those reports show that FDH and BM have different opinions of what SS4 can do and basically make BM look stupid.
- They talked about therapy and one woman there actually works for the place we checked into. She explained that the place was really busy and it would be hard to get in regularly like SS4 would need, so instead she suggested continuing to expose ss4 to social situations (as stated by FDH in the reports) - going to library and things were other children are present.
I have already looking into it and made a list of fun things to do with sKids over summer break - since BM and her 'Day Care, aka Grandma Care' won't do much I am packing as much as I can into our weeks. Most of which is at no cost.
- They said (what are have said all a long) ss4 is strong but lacks endurance. And he looks over his glasses a lot. BM tells people that he is almost blind. He just has a pupil issue (cat eyes) and bright lights bother him. I have said all a long that he can see.
- They addressed the eating issues and provided a book which BM handed to FDH. She only feeds him the 5 things that he likes so why would she read that?
- They talked about taking him off of the 'short bus'. BM flipped so they said they would let him ride one more year but they think she should ride with SS7 next year before SS7 starts rides a different bus. That leads me to believe that he has improved to the point that they are with drawling services (slowly).
- They are going to double check Summer School enrollment and see why sKids are getting 'low-income' help.
The over all tone that I gathered from FDH leads me to think that the reports may have done their job in letting the school know what BM is up to and not to believe EVERYTHING that she says any more. I am going to suggest to FDH that we ask for a written note or transcript from the meeting to send to SS4's docs. That was BM can't continue to tell the docs that SS4 can't do things. This is a lot of work but it seems to be working in ss4 favor. The important people are starting to see the light.
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FDH and I talked about PA,
FDH and I talked about PA, and I fully expect it. But right now with ss4, he likes to come to our house because we do things with him and take him places. BM stays home and doesn't let him do anything with out her or anything that me might get hurt doing, or that might upset him, ect.
Just the other day BM informed FDH that she was going to take SS4 after school on Friday because there was NO WAY SS4 would get on the bus after spending the after noon with her (school picnic) and she wants to spend some time ALONE with ss4. Well ss4 LOVES to ride the bus and he would but SHE won;t let him and SHE can't be away from him. Sadly she never asks for time alone with SS7.
So I could see ss7 clinging to her for attention as he gets older and ss4 trying hard to get away from her. But that could go the other way too. SS7 could get tired of being 2nd fiddle and ss4 could grow to love her smothering. Only time will tell.
In the mean time we just enjoy our little victories.
Also it is really tempting to
Also it is really tempting to tell SS7 the truth on Friday when he asked were ss4 is. But I will behave. No child should know that their mother just wants to be with their brother.
it is and I have always told
it is and I have always told FDH that I WILL not lie to the kids. If ss7 asks I will tell him where ss4 is, but now why. seriously that is the best I can do.
What BM doesn't realize it that her time 'alone' with ss4 give me time alone with ss7 - which he LOVES.
OMG BM emailed me - for the
OMG BM emailed me - for the first time in over a year. She wanted to tell 'us' about this place she had heard about. After FDH talked me up in the IEP meeting - that i do things with ss4 - i guess BM wanted to 'help'. I told her nicely that it was already on my 'list' for the summer and then went on to list about 20 more places that offer social interactions for ss4. I told FDH i don't care if she 'steals' them and takes the sKids before I do. They just need to get out of the house!