We have an united front...
So DH went to MIL's yesterday to pick up the computer he loaned her...
His mother was ranting about SIL and how that SIL makes more money than MIL, yet SIL asked MIL to borrow money, and when MIL said no, SIL got mad...No surprise here...They go back and forth with this behavior...One's the pot...the other's the kettle...
So DH said he told her, "Yeah, and that's why I stay out of SIL's business and yours, too...and don't let you guys in mine...It's too dramatic..."
DH told her that he knows that she's got some opinions about his "house" and what goes on there, but because he keeps her out of his business, she actually doesn't know WHAT is going on...and she make her own conclusions about stuff...
MIL agreed, then tried to say that she had concerns about me and how I was towards SD. She went into how I treat DS differently and better...blah...blah...blah...
DH went on to say that she (MIL) RARELY sees me, so he thinks that she's getting this from somewhere else and not from reality, but whatever (he didn't let her know that he knew about the facebook mess). He told his mom that she needed a dose of reality...
He said that SD was NOT a pleasant child and truth be told HE has a hard time dealing with her, and so does she (MIL)...He said it takes a LOT of work and she's HIS child, and does not subject or think I should be subjected to SD and her behavior...DH went on to say that I was great and he appreciated how I deal with him and SD, and if it wasn't for me, the majority of stuff for SD wouldn't get done...He told her that I was the best support for him and keeps him on his toes...
He said that he could tell light bulbs were going off in her head...
Pow! Take that you ol' bat!
I honestly don't think it's going to change anything, however...She's got her own views of who I should be...She thinks that I should pretty much be baking cookies, playing Barbies and taking SD to the mall and stuff, all while SD is acting a damn fool...And I should be doing this with a smile on my face...
Nope...Even DH doesn't expect that...
From the conversation, DH and I got a chance to talk about what he'd like us to work on, and it was a great conversation. He'd like for me to be more involved in doing "family" stuff when SD is over. I told him (again) that I didn't have a problem with that, but he needed to take ownership of what that means to him, and he agreed. He knows that I have been disengaged, but wants me to try to engage more...I agreed...We'll see...
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Comments
Wow, that's great!!!!! He
Wow, that's great!!!!! He sounds like a really great guy. So nice to hear that he's able to stand up for you to his mother. And even better that it sounds like he's willing to step up and make an effort to parent SD when she's there, so that you can be more involved without always have to be the bad guy
After 7 years, my SO is
After 7 years, my SO is finally sticking up for against his Mother, she kept denying she did or said anything bad to me, till one day she was on the phone with him and say something ugly to me, she had forgot who she was on the phone with, later when he confronted her to her face, she denied she had said anything to me, calling me a liar :jawdrop: , he said "she did not tell me anything, you were on the phone with me when you said that". Made her look bad in his eyes. Now he watches and listens and she knows it.
Sounds like he gets it...Good
Sounds like he gets it...Good job...
My MIL says she has a problem
My MIL says she has a problem with me because of the way I treat her GD, lady I have a problem with the way GD treats you, but I stay out of it. Because it is just that your relationship. SO, her son, "I would never gotten away with treating her like that growing up and she would have busted my ass if had treated my Grandmother the way my daughter treats her". I would rather my SD11 hate me, than manipulate, disrespect and mistreat me. She looks like a fool, rather than a loving GM defending her GD.