SD's behavior sets the tone of our activities when she's here! :(

Whenever SD7 comes over I swear there's a 50/50 chance my plans will have to change...

Why?

Because she's a bad azz...That's just the truth...I'm tired of sugar coating it...

So here were the plans...Considering I'm under the weather, DH was going to take DS2 and SD7...Pretty much that means he'll put them in the play room and let them play...and probably let them watch a movie together...And he'll make them something "fun" to eat...

Well...as usual SD got into trouble pretty much every day at school...even today...Friday...So when DH picked her up, he had a talk with the after school care teacher and got the report of her horrendous behavior...

So she's grounded...No TV...No games...No nothing other than a writing assignment from DH...

So I have DS because DH has to be around to enforce the punishment...

Not that I don't like spending time with my son, but my head is about to explode...or implode...either way it hurts like hell...

Now, if we planned on doing something as a family, it would have been canceled...

I swear...It's always this way...We can't ever plan anything because what happens is contingent upon her behavior...I feel like when she acts a damn fool the world stops...and when she acts 1/2 way decent, woo-hoo let's throw a parade!!!

That's so bass ackwards!

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That happens to me as well. I

That happens to me as well. I feel like I am grounded all the time because he is grounded all the time. Since I am the only one here to enforce this because DH is at work, that ends up cancelling everything. I have to go to the store right after work before SS comes home, other wise there is no way I can.

Yeah...We're working on

Yeah...We're working on trying to figure out how to keep our world going...

It's hard because we schedule everything when she's not here...Which is hard, because I get all kinds of negativity from MIL because we do a lot of stuff without SD...

For instance, we planned to go to the pumpkin patch tomorrow...It's probably not going to happen as SD is grounded...I could just take DS, but excluding DH is getting old...I'm just going to have to go back to planning stuff when she's not here...

And the funny thing is that she always complains that there's never anything to do when she's over our house...DH just tells her to shut it and act right and there will be something to do...I love that he shuts her down every time...He's no Disney Dad...

Great points, but not so cut

Great points, but not so cut and dry...

DH can more than handle the kids (he does a fabulous job), BUT considering he's sitting in a room with NOTHING but a table a pencil, piece of paper and SD, it's not fair for DS2...

SD is a different type of child...She HAS to be literally stood over in order for her to do right...DS in that equation is a distraction...

And getting a sitter? Yeah...we've tried that...we've gone through ALL of our friends, and nobody will keep her anymore...Well DH's friends...I wouldn't dare subject my friends to her...Even MIL weasels out of sitting...and not to mention the time frame...we get her Friday...she's grounded...even if we have something going on the next day, finding a sitter is a stretch...We have no family here other than MIL, so we don't have a circle of support...and I'm not ruining the base we do have cause we'll need them in the future for DS...

We used to have DS's old sitter as a possibility, but she wont keep SD anymore because of her "sassy mouth" and defiant attitude as the sitter put it...

Oh hell no! I've got your

Oh hell no! I've got your solution! Don't change your plans, bring SD along and NOT allow her to participate! Obviously not every function will this be reasonable, but you can change those plans to something else instead of not at all.
Ex: going bowling? Bring her along and she can WATCH you all bowl.
Going to movies? Rent one instead and either she sits facing away from tv or rearrange the furniture so she has to watch you all watch the movie.

I wOuld also make sure during the event you emphasis that if she made better choices she could participate.

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