I am 25 years old and engaged to marry my boyfriend (35) of 4 years who is divorced and has two children (ages 10 and 5). Once we got engaged I began having panic attacks about being a stepmother. I have my own step parents whom I don't have good relationships with because they have been unhealthy partners for each of my parents (obviously I am not treating my partner or his kids badly, but it has created a sour image in my head about the image of stepparents to children). When my boyfriend and I started dating his kids weren't really in the picture.