I've been married 5 years and all 5 years endured the relationship between my DH and the BM. I read all the blogs about women whose DH constantly fixes things in BM's house "so I can see my kids more" and women who endure the constant phone calls that he has to take (mine sleeps with his cell phone just in case BM calls with the light flashing all night like a beacon) ...these kids are teenagers by the way. I too would find out after the fact that he had fixed something, given her money for vactions, medicine, etc.