You are here

PolkaDotHedghog's Blog

Disengagement guilt

PolkaDotHedghog's picture

Submitted by PolkaDotHedghog on Sun, 10/07/2012 - 11:50am

Does disengaging make anyone else feel guilty?

Specifically in my case it's the hour on a sunday between my arriving home from work and the skids going back to BMs (so right now lol!).

It's dreadful. They need to be fed and changed back into their clothes from hers and for some reason my SO never leaves more than that one hour to do this in and they ALWAYS play up, refuse to eat, won't get changed (they're 5 and 6) and the youngest has to be physically held down and his clothes changed for him (which i think is totally ridiculous but that's another issue!).

Resentment

PolkaDotHedghog's picture

Submitted by PolkaDotHedghog on Wed, 08/29/2012 - 4:34pm

I'm feeling very resentfull. I'll be trying to be more disengaged this weekend when the skids are round (I've been inpired by this place and reassured that not being totally involved in everything doesn't make me a dreadful person), but the thing that's bothering me right now is basically the division of household stuff.

I do pretty much everything INCLUDING the skids laundry, cleaning up after them and putting away all their crap. The only thing I don't always do is cooking, but even the weekends I'm working and they're here, I still end up cleaning up after them.

Relief!

PolkaDotHedghog's picture

Submitted by PolkaDotHedghog on Mon, 08/27/2012 - 8:09am

I can't tell you how relieved I am to discover that this site exists.

I'm not sure if I technically count as a step-parent as I'm not married, but we live together so I think I might...

I have two skids, boys aged 5 and 6. BF has them every weekend at the mo, alternate weekends from September onwards and I am finding it HORRIFIC! Most Sunday evenings I've baracaded myself in our bedroom in tears hiding from them because I can't take one more second of whining and screaming and fighting, and I've been feeling so guilty about it.