Going to pick up the skids from daycare on Friday, I had my customary panic attack. I was going to arrive at the daycare ten minutes before it closed, and both of my kids were sleeping in the car, so I ended up pulling over in a random parking lot for ten minutes. That's what my life have been reduced to.

And of coarse, the skids didn't disappoint. Horrible behavior reports from school. SS10 was in rare form on Friday, and decided to refuse to do any work all day. Refused to do his math, his writing and reading. So another fabulous weekend for me and the BSs stuck in the house with the skids on punishment. This make 6 weeks in a row. Six weeks since I've gotten to do anything on the weekend, six weeks since I've been able to take MY kids anywhere. Dh works weekends, so I am stuck at home with them.

For the first time since they left for summer visitation with mil, SD actually brought me her laundry. It steaks of piss. And all her underwear is CAKED in dried urine and poop. I don't see how this kid doesn't have a raging UTI, she never wipes after pee or poop. Mentioned it to Dh yet again, yet again he doesn't follow through. He's as over it as I am..... I think we've both given up. Been on her for 5 years straight, since the day she came to live with us. She is quite frankly the most disgusting child I've ever met. Doesn't wipe, won't blow her nose, she chews on and reswallows phlem from her throat instead of spitting it out, you have to force her to brush her teeth. And its not from lack of correction and being taught. We've been on her consistantly for over 5 years. She just likes being dirty.

My mom had send down a package with (what I assume to be) pictures from when SS visited my mom for a week over the summer. Since he behaved so horribly in school, we didn't give it to him yesterday. My mom called to see if he liked his gifts, and when I told her about his issues at school and told her that we didn't give him the gifts yet, she went off. About how cruel it is to hold the package hostage from him, and that he has a disability (ADD) and how we are just cruel to punish him.

Note: his punishemnt is to sit in his bed and think about his behavior for a little while, and then no tv this weekend. So cruel right? It's a regular torture chamber around here. We understand he has issues, but he still needs consistant discipline. Having issues paying attention and issues sitting still is one thing, flatout being disrespectful and refusing to do all work is another.

So my mom continued to let loose about how poor SS shouldn't be punished, and how awful Dh and I are. She mentions how evil it is that we took him off his medication. Nevermind that she gave us tons of shit when we put him on it two years ago. You'd think she would be happy that he was off it. I explain that I had NO part in the decision to take I'm off and I didn't agree with it at all. She goes.... Well, your are his mother....... Well, actually no, no I am not his mother. I have no say in any medical decisions.... Well, you and Dh should be discuessing things and deciding together and this is just cruel that you punish him.

I ended up hanging up on her. For as much as my life fing suxs, and my own mother isn't even seeing things from my perspective.... Even in her eyes I am the evil step mother. Nevermind none of it is my decision. In her eyes nothingthese poor little skids could do is worthy of discipline, and I have no rights to a happy life. I have never felt so alone in my life.