Here's some background: SS is in a summer enrichment program for four weeks. BF agreed to give money to SS each week for the trips that he will be taking during this program. He also agreed to reimburse BM for 1/2 the gas money to take SS to this program, since it's driving she would not normally be doing because he usually rides the bus to school. Ok, fine. He is also still paying child support like clockwork. Some people may say that his CS payments should suffice for these extra fees but we have agreed to pay them so that SS can go to this program, because otherwise he wouldn't be able to and that's not fair to SS.

BF called on Monday to ask if he could take SS out to eat today (Wednesday), so that he could give SS the money he needs for his trip tomorrow. BM said, well, I'll be in your town on Tuesday, can we just meet up and you give me the money then? No...I want to eat lunch with my son. Ok, so she consented to let BF go get SS for lunch today.

BF gets a phone call from BM the next day (Tuesday) saying, I really hate to bother you, but can I borrow some money? BF asked what for?! She said there was a REPO MAN sitting in her driveway waiting for her to come home so he could take her car away because she's missed so many payments. She said that since she was already in our town anyway, she could just stop by his store and pick it up if he would loan it to her. BF consented and loaned her some money. I'm thinking this is why she really wanted to meet BF in town all along instead of letting him pick SS up in front of her whole family - she wouldn't want anyone else to know that the man she claims is a deadbeat has bailed her out of losing her car YET AGAIN.

You know, I'm OK with BF loaning BM money, because she always pays him back. So before everyone responds on how they would never "allow" their DH/SO to loan BM a dime, please just don't. Every time I blog about loaning BM money I hear so many responses like that and it's not even my issue. My issue is that this woman STILL doesn't understand that without a stable FULL TIME job, she can't make ends meet on her own. I hate that she continues to make BF look like the bad guy for wanting to get custody of SS until she gets back on her feet, and that she claims that her financial problems are because BF never pays his CS (which he always does). She is constantly having to get other people to bail her out of her debts because she chooses to remain underemployed. This woman is two steps away from a Master's degree (which she has been for the past five years because she let her obsession with me get in the way of her schooling and kept failing or not completing her semesters), and supposedly in two years the only job she's been able to get is part time substitute teaching? I don't think so. She's just not trying.

I understand that she will continue to do this until everyone cuts her off. I know we're only making the situation worse by continuing to loan her money. I just hate it for HER and especially for SS. What self-respecting woman would feel good about herself if she couldn't make ends meet on her own and constantly had to borrow money from her family and ex husband? And what else has she snipped from her budget? Depending on how long you readers have been on this site, you may remember that BM has had her electricity cut off, her phones and cell phones, internet, car insurance, and has been having her parents buy her groceries. I just hate the fact that SS has to go without because she's too vindictive and stubborn to let us take care of him.