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Another day in the life of PAS

notmyfirstrodeo's picture

Submitted by notmyfirstrodeo on Fri, 08/28/2009 - 9:11pm

Last weekend, BM refused to provide us with a uniform for SD5 so I could take her to school on Monday morning per the court order. When DH told BM that we would provide the uniform and come to the house at the end of the day on Monday to retrieve it, BM informed DH that if he showed up at her house without invitation, she would file a restraining order against him. Soooo, because BM refused to provide us with uniform and SD's backpack, we had no way of sending SD5's favorite stuffed kitty to school with her so that she could have it at home. And because BM made it evidently clear that DH is not welcome at her home uninvited, DH made no effort to take Kitty home. Of course, had BM called on Monday and requested Kitty, DH would've gladly obliged.

Lo and behold, BM calls tonight (after 4 nights) to ask where Kitty is. DH tells her it is in SD's closet. When BM asks him to bring it over, DH agrees to do so without argument or reminding BM of her restraining order threat. Why would he do that do you ask? Because he is an amazing Father and human being and thinks of his daughter, first and foremost. When DH arrives at BM's house, he knocks on the door. No answer!! He knocks again. No answer!!! Car is in the driveway. He knocks again. No answer!!! He sees shadows moving in the house. He knocks again. BM finally comes to the door, quickly grabs Kitty out of his hands and says "Thanks" as she is shutting the door. DH grabs the door and says "Can I at least say good night to my daughter?" SD is standing 10 feet from the door. BM replies with "I don't know. Am I going to get to come say good night to her when she is with you?" Seriously!! DH replies with "well she's standing right behind you. Come here baby and say good night to Daddy." In the end, he had the upper hand. But why in the world would a Mother say such things in front of her child? OMG!!!!!

Comments

Anon2009's picture

Submitted by Anon2009 on Fri, 08/28/2009 - 9:35pm

Really! We had a similar incident occur when we had EOW visitation- one of the skids forgot her favorite stuffed animals. She could not sleep without it. And with what those kids were going through at the time, well, the last thing they needed was to go without their stuffed animals!

So DH gets to BM's, after calling to ask if he can bring the stuffed animal over. She says ok, but only because she wants to try to get him back. So she flirts with him- IN FRONT OF THE KIDS- and they just looked like deer in headlights. He didn't say anything, then said, "come here and give me a hug, girls, I love you, good night!" and BM said, "Uh dude, when you left me you left them too!" HUH? I didn't know paying $1500 a month, calling your kids every night (as permitted by court order), being involved in every aspect of their lives, and seeing them every other weekend and any other possible time he could was considered leaving them. He left HER, NOT the girls. It's just so sad, the things some "adults" say and do in front of kids, especially their own!

Wicked.Step.Monster's picture

Submitted by Wicked.Step.Monster on Sat, 08/29/2009 - 2:05am

And then they wonder what's wrong when these children hit the teenage years and go nuts... it's because of this kind of crap!!! BM here told Skids how 'dad had lots of girlfriends that he liked better than her'.... the girls were 5 and 9 at the time! Who tells kids things like that???? Psycho BMs... that's who!!

Wonder.Woman's picture

Submitted by Wonder.Woman on Wed, 09/02/2009 - 11:37am

yeah. that's not cool.
we have given up expecting our BM to provide anything of value or usable and have opted just to prove the kids with the best we can! (uniforms, clean/new clothes, backpacks, lunch bags) For us, it's not worth having the kids suffer because BM is a selfcentered bitch. We'd rather provide it and never see it again in hopes that they are able to use them. It took me a while to get over the fact that we 'lose things' to her house - Now I've just taken the attitude of 'at least we can provide them with really nice things' and they feel valued and loved when they are with us! We have also come up with the system of keeping special toys at both 'mommy's' and 'daddys' with the occasional favorite toy going back and forth between homes in their backpacks.

I'd rather live above her every so LOW standard and don't think twice about it anymore!

Good luck!

Wonder.Woman