SD is BM's little spy!
In the grand scheme of things its really not a big deal. But it annoys me to no end and I have to vent 
SD repeats everything we do to her BM it doesn't matter how big or small she tells her BM. It's like every Monday SD is debriefed by BM or something. I don't know if she just offers up the info or if BM grills her. I think it is both.
The only reason I know is because Bm will text BF about something that SD told her or SD will come home and tell me things her BM said regarding what ever the thing was. It could be something minor like Newstep cut her hair to major things like my sister being ill. Stuff that is none of BM's business let alone she shouldn't even care about.
BF and BM raised all of the kids by giving them adult status. SD knows everyones business and always tries to put her two cents in. Drives me batty!! BF and I started a rule that we will not discuss anything in front of SD anymore but we will see how long that lasts :? I just hate BM knowing any of my business. Okay vent over LOL I just had to get that out see if anyone can commiserate with me.
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SD does the same thing. Once
SD does the same thing. Once I was explaining the family tree to my Grandson8 and little miss know it all was running her mouth talking over me. I said do you mind if I talk about my family to my grandson? SO laughed.
OH yes. I know it well.
OH yes. I know it well. BM-Bots that report back to the BM Mother Ship (TM)/
What you have to do is start mentioning outrageous things to SD so that the BM won't be able to discern fact from fiction. Get creative:
"Wow I was selected to be on Dancing with the Stars next season!"
"Can you believe I just won the lottery AGAIN!!??"
"Ford Modeling Agency just called and I have a two year contract in Vogue!"
I love it...wish that I had
I love it...wish that I had thought it yrs ago. SD16 is older now and more into self rather than report back to BM. She finally realized after living with her for 10 mos that she ain't s**t. Now that she is back living with us we let her roam streets, avoid studying and not do hmwk. All because its gonna bite her butt@the end. 16 and sophmore in HS is sad...top it off, stupid enough not to want to graduate? Just counting down the mos til she is 18! 14 mos to go!
I love it...wish that I had
I love it...wish that I had thought it yrs ago. SD16 is older now and more into self rather than report back to BM. She finally realized after living with her for 10 mos that she ain't s**t. Now that she is back living with us we let her roam streets, avoid studying and not do hmwk. All because its gonna bite her butt@the end. 16 and sophmore in HS is sad...top it off, stupid enough not to want to graduate? Just counting down the mos til she is 18! 14 mos to go!
SS13 listens in on every
SS13 listens in on every conversation in our house. Even from another room, he'll still interject himself. If he happens to miss a phone conversation, he'll grill you about it when you hang up, "Who was that, what did they want?" It's something that seriously bugs the crap out of me, but doesn't really seem to bother his father in the least. Or maybe Dad just doesn't really pick up on it? I try saying things like, "this doesn't concern you," or "I was talking to your father," or "we weren't speaking to you." The weird part is that I actually feel like I'm the one being rude when having to do that.
*shudder* You are giving me
*shudder* You are giving me FLASHBACKS!! All three skids have adult spousal status. They would always want to know who I or GG was talking to on the phone, what it was about, butt into every conversation, etc. etc.
I'll never forget (it's burned in my brain forever) one day I had to leave to go shopping or whatever when GG had his "angels" over on yet another ENDLESS weekend. VD (SD stb 13 at the time 9) said to GG: "Where is SHE going???!!" (said very sarcastically with hip jutted to one side and hands on both hips as is TM for VD)
It took all of my strength not to turn around and slap the shit out of her. I knew that if I so much as frowned at GG's "angels" it would be WWIII.
First of all you NEVER call an adult that you know "SHE" One time I referred to my mother as SHE and my father basically slapped me across the room and let me know in no uncertain terms that is the HEIGHT of rudeness.
Second of all, it's none of a nine year old who is a extremely POOR houseguest in MY HOME where I am going.
Of course GG gave some mealy mouthed girly response: "Oh she's going shopping, honey."
:sick:
So your SO never instituted
So your SO never instituted the "stay out of grown folk's business" rule?? That's crazy...Well if my opinion counts, you do NOT need to feel bad...I'd be telling him left and right to stay out of grown folk's business...It was told to me growing up, and I don't have a problem dishing it out...It's a rite of passage regardless of the child...I suspect that it's something DS will have to learn, too...
In my house a child will get clowned out interjecting themselves in anything related to adults...It's a disrespect...BUT SD doesn't have those boundaries at home. She and her mother talk about everything and a lot of stuff is inappropriate. She used to butt into adult conversations...Interrupt adult conversations...Question adults on their comings and goings and phone calls, etc...It had me floored...I was constantly clutching my pearls...DH nipped it in the bud...It was sooo rough at first, but she's gotten it...She slips up every now and then, but she does catch herself most times...Other times we have to set her straight...
I think it's normal, that's
I think it's normal, that's why I think it's important to keep your stuff that SHOULD be private, private, and disengage...
My SD talks about what goes on in our house to whomever will listen...It matters not...Soo, our solution to it is that first and foremost, there are areas in our house that she's not allowed...Like DH and my bedroom. Also, because we've instituted a "don't tell us chit about your mama" rule, we have totally turned off whatever we can't control...Also, there are somethings about our life that is private from her, unfortunately...Nothing rogue or mean...Just learning to not let the "left hand know what the right is doing" type of stuff...
BM used to text and call DH screaming and ranting, but he sent her a text back with 4 letters...M Y O B...period and finished...
She tried to bring up some of the crazy stuff she made assumptions over with her questioning of SD in one of her many trips to court, and the judge told her those same 4 letters, so it stopped...
My DH is pretty hard core when it comes to foolishness with BM...I guess that's the upside of them not ever being in a relationship...He's never had feelings for her, so the guilt trip she'd try to give him never worked because he can disassociate his responsibility to his daughter from his having to deal with her mother...He shuts her down like a pro...
I know how you feel...my SD
I know how you feel...my SD is 12 and is the only child at her mother's house, so she is, and has always been treated more as a BFF than a daughter...it can be very frustrating. I like Auteur's idea of "going overboard" with outrageous comments...I think we all know we need all the humor we can get in "Step-mother land!" Keep your head up, and stay positive...obviously her mother has nothing better to do than to pry into your life, so take it as a compliment!!
That is the case 100% with us
That is the case 100% with us she is BM's BFF and it drives me insane!! I love Autuer's idea I think I will go with that for sure }:)
I am thinking of it as a compliment as well. I always tell BF "who knew I was this interesting" LOL BM's obsession seems to ramp up every couple of months then dies down for a while.
Going back to court soon BM
:jawdrop: Going back to court soon BM asked SS11 to take pictures of our house to use in court.CYFBI SS refused.