New Mama's Blog
Terrified of SS7's lies.
After I received a 'lovely' call from SS7's school counselor yesterday because SS7 was going around telling other kids he was going to kill himself, DH and I sat down w/ SS7 last night to find out what the problem is.
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SS7 has been removed from his class.
I just received a call from SS7's school counselor - she tried calling DH but he didn't answer. She says, SS7 is in her office because he's been going around telling other kids he's going to kill himself all day long. She says he plans to stab himself with pencil lead.
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DH said, "You can't blame SM for being mean. This time it's me!"
At SS7's school he can get either a smile face, straight face, or a sad face based on how many times he gets in trouble. When I was disciplining him, he would be punished for anything less than a smile and we ended up with mostly smile face days. Once DH took over, he decided that SS7 has been doing much better and he would only be punished for sad face days.
It was a "Yes ma'am" kind of weekend... or was it?
This weekend was beyond stressful. SS7 stayed home instead of going to his grandparents, as punishment for being bad at school all week. SS7 had to do chores and homework for all of an hour and all was forgiven and forgotten. I did not agree with this punishment but for the sake of keeping peace, I did not voice my opinion.
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A day as a prison guard.
SS7 was in trouble all week and DH didn't punish him. Not. One. Consequence. As a result, DH says that he's leaving SS7 here for the weekend and asked if I could watch him today while he's at school for a few hours. Normally, I'd tell DH to go to hell. Our options were to to send SS7 to DH's parent's house and have him come home worse than he is, or, I could suck it up and stay home. I, reluctantly, agreed.
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SS7 cussed at his teacher... Time to re-engage.
Last night, DH told me we had to go to a parent teacher conference next Tuesday. We were both requested to attend. DH made it sound like SS7 was caught using bad words, when, in fact SS7 actually cussed at his teacher.
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DH agreed to counseling..
DH is staunchly against couseling, for what reason I don't know. I told him last night that I would go without him because I know the stress of everything going on here is too much for me to handle. Tonight, DH said he'd give it a try; "can't hurt, right?"
I'm still not sure where that leaves us. He's still sleeping on the couch and we still say very little to each other. I'm trying to give him whatever space he needs. I suppose it will take time.
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Peace and awkwardness.
DH and I were able to sit down and talk without screaming and fighting last night. We aren't sure where our relationship is going at this point - if DH and SS7 will move out or if we're going to give it another shot. We're going to take some time and think things thru for now and give each other some space, in the same space. To say the least, it's awkward.
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What I thought, was all wrong.
DH and I have been arguing non stop about SS7 since winter break. And we can't take it.
DH and SS7 stayed Monday night at his mother's house - which he hates. We texted/e-mailed vaguely during the day on Tuesday and I THOUGHT we were working thru this and life would essentially, go back to normal. Wrong. DH was still mad and still had an attitude. So then, I was mad and had an attitude. And they cycle started over within 10 seconds of seeing each other.
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Stealing goes unpunished and DH spends the night at his mother's house.
BD1 wasn't feeling good today so I picked her up early from daycare and came home with her. DH was home when we got here. I brought up to DH that when SS7 gets home from school he needs to talk to him about stealing. DH immediately got irritated, told me he'd handle it, and walked out of the room. I dropped it and we had a peaceful afternoon.