DH and I have been together for 3 years, living together for 2. We're not married but I call him DH for all intents and purposes. He has a son, SS7, from a previous relationship. We have a daughter, BD1, together and one one the way in June.

When DH and I started dating (4 years ago), he had full custody of son but SS didn't live with DH. SS had been living with DH's parents for the last 3 years because, DH says, he was too young to take care of SS.

DH was 20 when SS was born and SS's mother was only 18. SS was 3 years old when DH and BM split up and BM took off with another man and moved to another state. BM and I have talked and get along fairly well. She stays away and I send her updated pictures and reports about SS's school and such.

SS (at the time he was 4 years old) and I had a good relationship at first. I'd take him for ice cream and happy meals and he was fairly well behaved. Once DH and I moved in together SS started acting out, crying to his grandmother (DH's mom) that he hated me and wanted to know why I was stealing his dad away. DH and I sat him down and talked with him and it seemed to help a little.

I don't believe in spanking as a form of punishment so I used time outs with SS. DH's father told me that would never work and he was right. At the request of DH and his parents, I gave SS one good spanking for being disrespectful and then I went in my room and cried because I felt so bad about it. It worked. For a very short time.

When I found out I was pregnant with BD, I (and my family) were ecstatic. But the truth came out about DH's family: SS and DH's parents hated me and were not happy about the pregnancy. As a matter of fact, they made my pregnancy miserable. DH's parents began bad mouthing me infront of SS and since he was living with them at the time there was little we could do about it.

DH and I decided that we'd bring SS to live with us and set the move in date as July 2010, just after BD was born. We increased visitation days until the move in date to help him with the transition. DH's mother resisted and made it very difficult - she actually told SS that we had coyotes at our house that kill bunnies and kittens and he was scared to death to sleep at our house for months. And once, DH's father asked to take SS out of state on a 5 day trip which turned into a 30 day trip and caused SS to miss BD's first birthday and father's day.

Fed up with DH's family, we decided to move. We purchased our first home together in May 2011 and moved an hour away. We also moved SS in permanently. SS was enrolled in his new school and busy making friends in the neighborhood. SS's vists to his grandparents lessened and things seemed to be getting better.

SS began having trouble at school. He was stealing, lying, being disrespectful, etc. He began having the same issues at home but they were almost always directed at me. Recently, he started having temper tantrums to get out of anything he doesn't want to do. For example, we asked him to eat his vegetables and he threw a huge fit and forced himself to throw up.

DH and I are struggling to keep it together. His fits stress us out and cause us to fight with each other...... And that leads us to now.