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This child makes me ghetto

myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Sat, 07/06/2013 - 10:47pm

... in my head

At first, it's just me thinking "Look kid, I know what you're doing, and it won't work."

Now, it's like this...

"Mimi, what if I don't like my tamale?"

"If you try it, and you don't like it, you can have an apple."

"Mimi, my apple tastes funny, can I have a cheese stick?"

NO MOTHERFUCKER! YOU CAN GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP! WANNA WHINE ABOUT HOW I DON'T GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU! FINE! GO AHEAD AND THINK THAT WHILE YOU LIE IN BED HUNGRY YOU LITTLE ASSHOLE!

"No SS, you may not have a cheese stick."

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myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Sat, 07/06/2013 - 11:15pm

Right?

chokinonlemons2u's picture

Submitted by chokinonlemons2u on Sat, 07/06/2013 - 11:31pm

Omg. Just fought DH last night about that EXACT same situation. Except my kid was the annoying skid. Lmfao.

And you could SEE in DH face he was thinking EXACTLY that!!!!

What he said to me after I over rode his no to the cheese stick and apple was " Great! Why don't you just make him a peanut butter sandwich too while your at it!!"

So after my son ate his apple and his cheese stick ( the pizza flavored ones) I made him a peanut butter sammich and sat w him at ten in his room while he ate it watching Cartoon network while DH layed on the couch pissed off!!!

I swear to God. Can't make this up. If there was any peanut butter in your situation too, I may faint!

myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 12:33am

Faint away. He ate his apple, then wanted a peanut butter sandwich, then bitched that the PEANUT BUTTER tasted funny.

This kid dude. Sheesh.

Luckily DH and I weren't fighting about it, in fact he was more pissed than I was I think.

DH looks at him and goes "If you're going to cry I'm going to make you stand outside to do it."

I tell him, "Daddy wouldn't really do that, it's dark outside."

DH goes "There's a porch light out there."

I go, "Yes, and there are bugs as well."

"Daddy, are you serious?"

*silence*

Me - "No, Daddy's not serious."

SS walks back to the kitchen to make another attempt with the PB.

chokinonlemons2u's picture

Submitted by chokinonlemons2u on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 2:13am

Holy shit! Is your skid 7???

If so your BM may have brought home my sons apple, cheesestick, peanut butter eating twin from the hospital!!! I knew my belly was huge w that one....

myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Mon, 07/08/2013 - 12:19am

Hahaha! 5

chokinonlemons2u's picture

Submitted by chokinonlemons2u on Mon, 07/08/2013 - 12:27am

Myspoon, he is sitting next to me eating cookies after finishing a hotdog right now!!!!!

ltman's picture

Submitted by ltman on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 6:55am

Those "twins" have an older brother who doesn't realize how close he has come to being an astronaut on so many occasions. To the moon Alice, to the moon.

realitycheckmom's picture

Submitted by realitycheckmom on Sun, 07/07/2013 - 9:05am

LMAO could the food taste funny because the kid actually has some congestion or allergies going on? I only ask because that will make things taste off and sometimes kids can't put it together. Smile

myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Mon, 07/08/2013 - 12:20am

Nah, this one was just having a picky mcpickerson night. Today he ate the same PB and was perfectly fine.

chokinonlemons2u's picture

Submitted by chokinonlemons2u on Mon, 07/08/2013 - 12:37am

I have to make sure mine eats at least five meals a day plus snacks because between his ADHD meds and his super hyperactivity when they were off after eight hours he has a genuine hard time keeping weight on. He has gained an inch i height but lost four pounds. Its a real struggle. Sounds weird and stupid but its for real. So if he wakes up at midnight or one hungry...I feed him.

myspoonistoobig's picture

Submitted by myspoonistoobig on Mon, 07/08/2013 - 1:21pm

Sad I hope he improves over time. One of the reasons SS's diet is a concern is because of less severe ADD that's linked to poor diet. He gets so much fucking sugar at home!

And no, his time here won't change that, but I'll be damned if I'm going to let him poison himself on my dime in front of my kids.