I will start by giving you my background. I have been a stepparent for 17 years, all 3 boys, now 24, 21, 19.  There was a 3 year separation from 2009 to 2012. Married officially in 2014, have 2 children together 12, 8.  Not long after meeting my spouse I was inserted into the boys' lives. I was 21, so it was scary and exciting and I had no idea what hornets nest I had just got myself into.  Over the years we have fought repeatedly because of his sons. They caused so many issues that my H left me 6 weeks after I had our son.