poor dh
so court was today. the judge suspended his visitation until he does at least two counseling sessions with bb. dh broke down in court because it's so unfair that bb can spew off at the mouth with her lies and yes, copies of my text messages, recorded phone conversations with dh, but yet when dh tried to explain how he hasn't gotten to see or talk to sd for weeks now, nothing. i know the judge is just aggravated because he told them to seek counseling. and i told dh back when the judge requested counseling to just do it. don't get me wrong, i know why he didn't want to. she is a liar and a conniving bitch. but she is sd's mother and if he wants to see his daughter, he had better listen to the judge, regardless of what he thinks the outcome will be. i told dh if after these sessions bb is still acting up, then at least he has a leg to stand on in court. so that's that for now. no more sd, not like we've been seeing her, until at least aug. 6. but like dh said, i guareentee, bb has a problem with all the counseling dates. i mean, technically, she could put them off for a month. meaning that's another month dh doesn't get to sd. it's just insane. how could bb sit there in court and not feel SOMETHING for this man who is crying, and he never cries, because all he wants to do is see his daughter. she drove by him on the way home just smiling. she thinks she is so smart. it's pathetic. and yes, dh was upset with me because of my stupid text messages, but i told him i am done. done getting involved, done talking to her, done worrying about sd. hopefully this is just another bump in the road and this too shall pass.
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I figured she would use the text messages.
Ladies and gentlemen. Please remember who we are dealing with. These people receiving nothing but pleasure making our lives miserable. Even though we are the ones raising their children. Please never fall for this trap ever again.
Not a suprise
but terrible, I am sorry your DH is having such a tough time. I should count my blessings that right now we are not dealing with crazy stuff like this. BM use to lie in court and then stand outside waiting for DH to walk out, then she and her mom would laugh as loud as they could to get his attention. It's pathetic that people would take such pleasure is someone elses misery, especially someone they claimed to love at one time. Keep your chin up hon. We are here for ya.
~Evil
Our greatest glory is not in never falling but in rising every time we fall.
Confucius
Just another prime example...
of why it's important for the dad's to listen to the court to a T...
I'm sorry to hear of your trepidations. It's awful how some of these woman use their children, but at the same time, while it doesn't ease the wounds, it's just one more example why it's important to follow through with what the court suggests...
For one thing, if Dad had followed through with his part, and BM kept rescheduling, it still favors your case since you are trying to accommodate the court... not BM. BM on the other hand, will get reported by the counselor as deflecting the issue. Second, in counseling, while it may be seen as just a nuisance, generally speaking, the reason for the counseling is not only to try to get the two parents to begin to co-parent, but also a means for evaluation for the court. Parenting classes are obviously set up to help the parents, co-parent, and if the courts see the need, they will require it... and it may just be a step in the process to get to the next step too. Process of elimination, if you will. In order to properly evaluate a situation, sometimes you have to do the stupid ridiculous steps to get to the next level, you know. If counseling has been ordered, I'd follow the order because some of these judges- not all naturally- so have a course of action or plan and have to go through due process to achieve it. And in doing that, sometimes, you have to go through the hoops for them to show who just is in the right frame of mind. And on top of all that, the BM's really do get the better end of the stick... some judges know that, some don't care, and others just want their paycheck.
Man has the intelligence to change his life,
Sometimes, he just fails to use it...
I'm so sorry for you and dh....
That royaly sucks.... There is a saying I heard a long time ago that I always tell myself when bb is getting away with her crap.... (we haven't seen my sks in 3 months)!! I don't remember it word for word.... but the just of it was.....
'Evil is allowed to flourish for some time and good will suffer... but in the end good always wins and the people will see that evil never wins in the end'
It makes me feel better....
Wow I am Sorry
I hate court and it seems like the BB's always have the upper hand. Counseling would NEVER work for my DH and the BB. She will just use it for her own bashing purposes
it's not the upper hand
per se (because that would imply that she is an intelligent human being), it's the fact that she is the mother, and the fact that we live in a backwoods, mom's-the-best-parent state. and i do agree with step mom in that the judge has to take certain steps and dh will have to jump thru particular hoops, BUT if bb keeps pulling this shit, the judge can take the next step, which could actually mean holding her in contempt! so, i believe in the judge and i KNOW he sees her evil ways, which is why he was coming down on dh so much. i told dh that too. obviously he isn't wasting his time by telling bb anything, instead he is counting on dh taking the higher road since he is the one wanting to see his kid. you know? i know it sucks, but she sure as hell isn't changing.
i'm so over it right now. i am so over having anything to do with her, and sd right now. and you know what? it feels damn good!!!!
and
counseling will not work for these two either, but like i said, whatever it takes to keep the judge happy and the process moving. i told dh, look, you've been trying this hateful response to her craziness for 8 years now...it's time to do something else. kill her with kindness. go to counseling all smiles. seriously, i am so pushing for this right now. miserable people can't stand sympathy...or happiness.
