Hey guys, I am new to the forum but needed someone to vent and hopefully a little input and advice as well.  Please feel free to either pat me on the back and give me kudos or blast me but do give me some advice because at this point, I am reaching out.  Here goes!  I have a rather unique situation.  I have been with my BF for 9 years.  We can not get married for several reasons, mainly financial (my husband was killed many years ago).  I still have my own home and he has his.  I have four children, all now grown, have college degrees and out on their own!  He has two girls and an ex from h