SS20 might be losing his job
We honestly thought everything was great. Rainbows, sunshine and unicorns. It is the perfect job for him, perfect hours and right across the street from my office so I can drop him off in the morning.
Well, his boss called me today. He has a serious attitude problem and apparently totally acted like an a$$ in front of the district manager. I can't believe they didn't fire him on the spot based on what she said. I told them if they have any issues in the future to call me and put him in timeout in the break room. I would come over and straighten him out.
Then I called the DARS counselor and his job coach. Apparently there has been several problems and he even got caught stealing. They didn't call me because he is technically an adult and he asked them not to. However since things have escalated they have assured me that they will keep us notified.
If he loses this job I don't know what I am going to do. I seriously want to cry. DH is livid. He went for a run to calm down before we sit SS down and address this with him- which is good because DH can get hot headed with SS. SS knows every one of his dads buttons! I think I am going to just pour a drink. Sounds better than a run right now.
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The pushing buttons....BM
The pushing buttons....BM here claimed SS lacks the cognitive ability to know he is pushing DH's buttons so would be confused why his dad raged at him. For one thing, he never raged at him. Second, SS knows exactly what he is doing when he is intentionally pushing buttons or manipulating someone. BM always played off to the judge that SS functioned way less than he does.
Good luck with your SS in reigning in his attitude problem at work.
I don't even take calls from
I don't even take calls from the school about my 7th grade SS and you have SS20s employer calling you!! If one of the girls employers called me, I'd say wrong number and give them BMs number.
His BM is 100% out of the
His BM is 100% out of the picture and has been most of his life. He is autistic so them calling me isn't like a normal 20 yr old's boss calling.
I am the only real mom who actually gives a damn about him that he has ever had. Even in my frustrations I would do anything for him. I love him and want what is best for him. He is closer to 12 than 20 as far as maturity goes.
Having a special needs adult child is a lot sometimes.
You are a saint.
You are a saint.
I'm in the same position (bio mom doesn't give a f about her own son but still thinks she's the mom of the year lol), but I don't think I will be able to do the same as what you are doing when SS is 20. Group home is already constantly in my head although DH and I are not talking about it yet (SS is only 13 anyway).
I am far from a saint. I
I am far from a saint. I wouldn't get near as frustrated as I do if I was.
I knew early on in dating my husband that SS20 was not going to be able to launch and live on his own. DH was so awesome. He arranged with me to talk to his teachers and therapist so that I knew exactly what was going on, what expectations should be for him, and his level cognitive ability. Nothing was ever hidden from me. SS20 is probably the only area in steplife where I can honestly say- I knew what I was signing up for. I am a human though so there are days that are just harder than others for me to deal with it.
My DH definitely doesn't plan
My DH definitely doesn't plan to live with his son forever. When I met SS he was 8-9..and we didn't live together so I didn't really "feel" it. Even now I'm involved in every part of SS's life I can't say I'm happy to be in this.
You should totally take the compliment hehe. That's not to put more pressure on you (to act like one). It's really just my pure admiration.
You have a lot on your plate
I hope you are getting plenty of rest. Please take care of you. Sending all best wishes for the best outcome with all your loved ones.