Quick update

DHs 40th was over last weekend, I went as all out as the Navy would allow. His childhood best friend, mom and sisters all flew in and surprised him, we had a great party! It ALMOST felt like life was back to normal. It was so much fun to hang out with my in-laws and DH's friend!

Now for the negative side:

I messaged SS the morning of DH's bday to remind him to wish his dad happy bday.

Once the party was going and some people were asking how all that mess was going and I overheard DH saying that SS was become a narcissistic a$$ like his mother- I messaged him again "Dude. Your dad is literally sitting her telling people how proud he is of you. All you need to do is say a simple happy birthday. Remember, you are going to have to face him in a week. Don't be a jerk. Make the choice to be a good son." -- Of course I was lying about what DH was saying but whatever.

That little shit didn't text DH until the following day and didn't respond to anything DH wrote back.

He is supposed to be here Saturday. DH still hasn't spoken to him since he left after Christmas. DH said that if he shows up, which is doubtful at this point, he is going to put in for emergency leave for a family crisis and stay home with him all week. He said he is taking his cell phone from him and doing a bag check for more vape stuff as soon as he walks in the front door. (BS found vape stuff when he was in SS's room looking for a missing hoodie).

DH texted BM last night to verify that she would be taking him to the airport- of course no response.

Anyone want to let me and my bios come stay if SS shows up? LOL! I don't even want to be home. Neither me or my bios even want him to show up. I honestly don't think DH wants him there either. Cross your fingers for us! All we need is the final court hearing for the financial side of things and then we can just stop. Drop the rope and move on with our lives.

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Glad you had a fun party.

I hope that's your last birthday reminder and DH's last reminder to BM.

Absolutely on my part.

I just hate how much it hurts my husband.

Yep, been there. But you

Yep, been there. But you know your reminders won't help, and almost make it worse - then he's been reminded and he STILL doesn't do it.

I will say that the reminders

I will say that the reminders to him and his refusal is helpful to me. I no longer see him as just mommy's puppet. He is making the choice to be a jerk- that makes it easier for me to disengage from it all and stop caring.

I am so happy you had a nice wekend

and birthday party for your DH!

As unforunate as it is, it might be for the very best if SS does not show up and then when SS is an adult he can make the decision if he wants to pick up his relationship again with his father. Clearly SS DOES NOT care about his dad, cannot even manage a 2 second text message to wish his dad a happy birthday on his birthday.

I really do hope the court hearing for the financial side goes in your favor, it really should and needs to, but we all know how all that has been playing out for you ... It is really sad how parental alienation has worked for BM.