Frustrated with DH
DH didn't confront SS16. (He is smoking weed in the bathroom at attempting to cover it up with axe body spray)
We did search his room and the bathroom while he was out with BS15's friend and found a burner cell phone (in case we grounded him again, I'm sure) but no weed.
DH has duty today so he won't be home until tomorrow night, which just leaves me and the 2 SS's.
I realize that I am a total control freak personality and because DH didn't deal with the smoking, I feel like I won't be able to keep my mouth shut if I notice it again.
I know a lot of people don't care about smoking/ingesting marijuana- but DH and I do in our house. DH's career field is very strict and he will lose everything. They don't give people in his position even a review or counseling - he is GONE. He has worked far too long and sacrificed far too much to have something go wrong, so it is not allowed in our home.
I am pissed that it wasn't already dealt with. I am pissed that SS is in my house right now. I am just bitter and angry and trying to not take it out on everyone around me. It is so bad that (TMI) I can't even get in the mood for sexy time and DH and I usually have a very active sex life. It has been a week and I can't bring myself to even attempt to do anything.
22 more days. I hate this so much.
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Maybe
if you catch him/smell it again. Pop open a beer/pour a glass of wine and drink it right in his face. You have cameras I think I remember reading.
Then tell him if you can smoke pot surely you aren't offended by me drinking since I'm a friggin adult.
He is such a disrespectful little brat, Grrrr I am counting down for you!
What would happen..
What would happen if you said to SS, " I smelled pot in the bathroom yesterday. I'm not sure if you know this, but that one thing could jeopardize your dad's entire career. They are very strict about things, your dad wouldnt even get a review. I'm sure you didn't understand that and I know you wouldnt want dad's career to be ruined because of something like this."
The way the HCBM
is I'd be afraid she'd use that information with her little mini me to invite trouble.
Yeah, I would say that based
Yeah, I would say that based on SS' history, SS would be happy to watch DH be fired. This dynamic is way too HC. Any "conversation" about natural consequences of SS' actions would be lost on SS. Honestly, I would demand that SS return to BM's house immediately for disrespecting your household.
Yikes, my DH is military too
Yikes, my DH is military too so I know the deal. He needs to come home tomorrow and scare them straight. It doesn't matter what they do at BMs you have a zero tolerance policy at your house. I would be tempted to raid their room and remove any pot you find.
I think I would be tempted to
I think I would be tempted to tell SS to go spend the night at a friends house while his dad is on duty.
You have every right to be
You have every right to be frustrated, as usual.
So how long is DH going to cower in the corner? I'd insist he deal with this as soon as he walks in the door, no matter if it's 3am and he has to wake up SS to deal with it. I'm the first supporter of pot, but completely agree with you that this is inappropriate and disrespectful (and hypocritical!) for him to be smoking in the house and thinking you are a fool for not smelling it, especially considering the risks associated career-wise for your DH. Cmon. The kid is asking for it. He's flaunting it. Then a burner phone. I've had it with this kid myself.
If DH does not parent and SS behave, time for SS to go home and the story comes to an end. I've always been a supporter of your DH's fight for his son but enough is enough with this kid.
Next time he's in the
Next time he's in the bathroom and yoususpect he's smoking, wait outside for him (or at least your DH should wait outside for him) and when the smell of MJ wafts out with him, he should make him take a urine test on the spot and tell him he's going to the police with it ... for SS's own good. The kid needs a serious scare if anything is to get through to him. If he or his mother demand that he go home on the spot, well, OK, but they pay for the ticket, otherwise he's stuck with his fther.