Court Yesterday

The judge refused the set aside and now wants a full hearing for everything. The dates we are currently being given are dates when DH will be out to sea. Trying to work this out is so freaking impossible. I hate BM so much.

justmakingthebest's blog
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SMH. I'm frustrated with the

SMH. I'm frustrated with the way the courts have handled your case, I can imagine how you feel. I'm sorry.

Family court is such a money

Family court is such a money making scheme its gross. I keep hoping you will post one day "We WON!" and then never have to deal with BM or SS again.

If she is faced with long

If she is faced with long postponement vs settlement, would she settle?

I don't know. That is

I don't know. That is something that we might wind up looking at with our lawyer.

"Winning" is everything to

"Winning" is everything to people like this, so any offer has to be presented from the standpoint of she wins, he loses. By settling, you will save a lot on lawyer fees, but present it like you are paying her that savings. And if she has a lawyer, present that she will reap those savings as well, plus whatever the actual arrearage is. So actual arrearage plus bonus for her. It might help if he lowballs a bit so she can beat him into submission on counteroffer.

I just spent the last 2 hours

I just spent the last 2 hours (at work, don't tell on me) going through the math. I believe we owe her about 5K at this point- of course the order didn't happen until 5 years after the fact so it's not like we knew it but that is probably the real number based on average income for her profession, actually I went $2/hr less than average for my calculations and I went at DH's current income, which is the most he has ever made and not even supposed to be part of these. So the real number is probably 2-3K, but whatever.

I told DH that I think we should offer 4K and to drop the 3 contempt charges. We will pay by May 1st the last CS payment and the 4K settlement.

I think that we are going to have to threaten that we know she hasn't been on SSI since Dec 2018. That we have her employer and name them. That we are going to subpoena her employer. We will subpoena all her tax records and bank accounts, employer payroll tax records and payroll statements.

That we have a copy of her nursing license

That we have statement from friends and her other son's stepmother that she is working

We have the information, we just needed the day in court to expose her- or- she can take the money and we can all be done with eachother in less than 30 days. She won- SS is alienated, that is all she really wanted anyway, right?

So DH agreed and I just got

So DH agreed and I just got off the phone with our attorney. Hopefully we hear something back in a few days.

I'm not sure she will be

I'm not sure she will be afraid of this douchey judge.

Trials cost in excess of 10k. If DH lowballs and she counters with something doable, it would be in his best interests to take it.

I agree. I think we are

I agree. I think we are willing to go up to 10 just to end it... We are going to come out of pocket all of that if we go to this trial anyway- just like you said.