Long week already!
Since the the therapy on Monday, I am still festering. After DH going on about the decorating and my inability to allow him to have a say, which is bullsh... I have barely spoken to him. Also, since I get attacked anytime I point out anything about SD13, I have barely spoken to the kid. What is the point, if everything I do is seen as hostile to her. So I spend a lot of time in my office or my room. He however watches 3 hours of TV with her in the same Family room that he won't let me re-deocrate. Every night that they are here, it is all her. He never attempts to watch TV with either of the boys, just her. Meanwhile, she goes back and forth to the TV and the computer all night long. If my son jumped up and down all evening when he watches TV (only on the off week when his kids aren't here) he would be all over him. He doesn't even seem to realize that I am still irritated with him. So frustrating.
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You need to disengage. My
You need to disengage. My DH started getting so defensive of SS9 that I couldn't even say anything good about him!!! It really sucked. Now, I don't talk about SS9 unless DH brings him up and I disengaged from him so I don't go insane.
As for the decorating issue. You said you didn't want to change the living room, you just wanted to make it look nicer. If you aren't going to paint the walls or change the furniture, I would just redecorate while DH wasn't home and see what he says when he sees it. If he doesn't like it, he can change it back.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
Yeh, let him change it back
Yeh, let him change it back and do some of the work if he doesn't like it! He probably doesn't realize that you're irritated. Men are not emotionally intelligent. He will if you continue to avoid him and his spawn. And when he does tell him that you'll stop being irritated when he stops being a douchebag.
I'm sorry that wasn't very helpful, was it? I guess I am a little pissed of myself today. I don't know how to help since you seem to have a stupid therapist. Why wouldn't dh want to update the old room when the rest of the house has been updated? Is it him or is it that this is sd's comfort room and he doesn't want to upset the little princess? We had some issues with SD complaining about the "changes" in our house (painted walls and new flooring) because "this isn't how it looked when I lived here with my mom". The place looked like a blind person decorated it. We just told her "you mom doesn't live here. she decorate her new place however she wants".
"God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy" and you can't change crazy!!
DH and I bought a house just
DH and I bought a house just when SS turned 8. So I didn't move into BM's house. SS still thought he had a say in the decorating of our house, lol, WTF? I lucked out though, DH told SS that decorating is the woman's job (thank goodness for that).
I hope your day gets better.
"If I turn into another, Dig me up from under what is covering the better part of me" -Incubus
I already painted the room
I already painted the room myself - the exact color he had it. Burgundy walls. I just want to get new furniture and the entertainment center removed and a flat screen in its place. He designed the entertainment center and is attached to it. I want to make the pictures on the wall more cohesive. Each has a different type of frame. That is it. He acts like I have no taste and should leave this area alone.
As for the stepdaughter I have tried so hard to disengage, but everytime I do, she does something or mouths off that I get dragged back in. This week it was youtube videos she was watching and he was doing nothing about it. Very innappropriate stuff. My comment was if you can't be trusted to decide what is innapropriate to watch, I will disconnect the internet in the evenings. I pay for it. He got mad and said he would have another wifi hooked up then. I said you are missing the point. End of discussion.