for step parents- help me understand- I am the mother of 2 grown kids still at home 19 and 21. One is attending college and has a job, etc. the other quit school and subsequently his job- without excusing his shortcomings- I am sick of the constant stress being in the middle of husband and kids fighting. Is there a time that spouses (step parents)step back and realize we are trying the best we can and their constant berating is not helping but hurting the situation. my kids are not BAD as a personal attack to inconvenience you.