Revisionist history
Some of the recent posts and some personal experiences have me thinking of the phrase "revisionist history." And a little bit "fake news."
Like the proud dads talked about on this site who only remember or focus on the fact their child advanced a grade but not that the child is several years behind in a subject or nearly failing or was suspended several times or...
My DH does that regarding the skids and he does it with situations with me. For example, he asked me to give something to a friend he knew I was seeing that day (along with a bunch of other people, so I wasn't seeing this person specifically). DH is helping this friend with something and wanted to get him some paperwork. The next day he asked me what the friend thought about it and I said I didn't know and said I thought they had talked. DH said, no, he thought I'd be talking to this friend since I "was so excited to give the friend the paperwork." Uh, no. It was not even on my radar as it is not my thing and DH stopped me before I left the house to ask me to give the friend the paperwork. I wasn't bothering him to let me do it, I didn't ask about it.
I could ask the three kids and DH to each privately recount an event and get two different stories: the same one from the three kids (and me) and a different one from DH.
What is it about some people (men?) that they cannot seem to remember a situation accurately? Is there an actual physiological problem or it is psychological?
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Let me know when you find out because my DH is the same way. The kids can all have one story and his is always a different version. And somehow the version ends up blaming them for something. They have gotten pretty resentful about it over the years. It puts me in a tough spot because there are times I believe the kids and it's hard to look at the other adult in the house and say "I don't believe you"
Hm, DHs usually make himself or the skids out to be golden
My DHs revisionist histories usually end up making him or the skids look better. If anyone has to be at fault then it's someone else (me, DS, others).
One of the last ones that involved him and the skids, he was claiming he handled/enforced something for them in elementary school. That was totally bogus as I know BM handled it and there's documented evidence.
Good question...I kind of
Good question...I kind of think DH rationalizes however he can what's going on in the moment and over time that gets cemented in his head as the "real" memory.
Hm, that's probably some of it
Could be rationalizing, not listening, and just plain wanting it to have been a different way so remembering it that way.
My DH does the same thing.
My DH does the same thing. He will have a conversation with SD13. I will be standing there and hear the entire thing. Later, we will be talking about it and it's like we are hearing two totally different conversations. Usually, it involves when SD13 talks about BM or wanting to live with her. My DH will make it seem like SD is being all considerate of his feelings when he talks about it. The truth is that SD is usually considerate, but that goes out the window any time her mom is involved. She shows blatant favoritism. But my DH can't stand to admit that fact. I have just gotten to where I ignore it. Its not worth the fight.
Industrial Strength
can 'o turd polish.
Chef used to be able to polish a turd to a gleam that would fry your retinas.
LOL I nearly choked! But then,
I know a kid who saw some article or video about being able to polish turds. So he did it. Literally. He made polished turds. The best part: he is genius level smart in math and got invited to an ivy league school interview because they wanted to recruit him. When asked about a hobby he liked but gave up he didn't mention the multiple instruments he knows how to play but doesn't, no, he mentioned polishing turds.
These men take some truth,
These men take some truth, add a big dose of ego, and run it through the ole Bull Sh!t machine.
Most of the time, my H is a straight-shooting, just-the-facts-ma'am, John Wayne type, but ooh, the blarney he used to blab about YSD back when we were raising her! To be fair though, over time and as he's gotten older he"s made peace with how screwed up his adult kids are.
ITB2012, I believe we're
ITB2012, I believe we're married to the same man! When my OH does it in relation to the skids, it's because he truly believes they fart rainbows. But even when it's not about them, his recall of events is often very different to mine, DD & DS. I would LOVE to know the reason why.