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Court Case Update.....(Not what we wanted ... but progress)

imagr8tma's picture

Well to our surprise BM went to court saying she worked out the differences with DH, SM and his family. They came to the table ready to negotiate.

So the judge instead of actually letting the hearing go forward. They worked out a new court order.

None of our evidence had to be submitted - so we still have all of it... in case she messes up again (which i am confident she will) we will be able to submit it to the court instead of losing it in this case.

It has been put in the court order......

---Mother is not to partcipate in alienation neither is any third party on her behalf - meaning her mother/father

---she has to meet at exit 168 at 630 on Friday and 430 on Sunday, if she is late or changes the location she is in contempt

---she can no longer schedule things on DH weekends, and no extra curricular activities unless DH is giving 4 weeks notice in writing and agrees

---If DH has to drive all the way to Fayetteville North Carolina for a pick up - BM has to drive to Va to pick SD up

--- He now has 5 weeks in the summer - 3 in June and 2 in July. The judge set the dates - so now she can not block it with supposed dance camps

---DH gets every other year for thanksgiving and alternates christmas dates (meaning odd years - SD comes for 10 days starting 26 December and even years SD comes for 10 days starting the school lets out.)

---BM is now required to meet half way for all visits unless DH approves otherwise in advance.

---Judge told DH if she continues to be in contempt to get the police involved and submit the reports to the court.

---She can not go back to child support court for 5 years since she has taken him every year (sometimes twice a year)

--- Judge told BM's Lawyer she was sick of her client bringing DH to court and it being bogus crap. She also stated if BM comes before the court again in contempt - custody will change hands.

--- Our lawyer said Judge says BM is essentially on probabtion and if she messes up again - there will be no more chances.

---It is also in the court order - DH can speak to SD daily on a phone call for at least 15 mins before bedtime where ever she is located, He is to be made aware of all school calendars and programs 5 days in advance, he is to receive report cards within 5 days, etc

---Judge also made BM sign a memorandum of agreement - to state she agreed and understood what went into affect and that it was affective starting yesterday evening. So she can not act an azz since the new court order may not show up for months.

Our lawyer said the good thing is that we did not have to submit any of our evidence - so if she acts out again.... we are still able to use it against her.

BM played all of them in this conference though - after sitting there all damn day, and after she signed the memorandum of agreement - when she was leaving the waiting room, she leans back out of the elevator and she and her friend say, "See ya suckers".

We immediately told the lawyers of her taunt and attitude, of course nothing can be done cause the child was not present - but just wanted to let them know - her actions almost guarantee she will continue to act a damn fool. She did not even let the ink dry on the agreement for her to stop the foolishness.

So now we are back to waiting to see what she pulls now..... However although she will not take it serious, we are going to press forward if she acts out. She has had 6 years to get her mess together and accept that DH has a right to be in SD's life.

Comments

MiseryNMissouri's picture

I cant believe she said by suckers...So basically she is on probation as you put it...well this is a new one, i think all judges should use this, BM Probation...well based on this i know you guys will be back in court, i just wonder how much more your DH husband can endure...i mean your BM is straight crazy

HummingBirdHunny's picture

Well it sounds like things got accomplished for the good on your behalves. And judging by the "see ya suckers" comment..it seems like she thinks she got what she wanted or that maybe she will try to pull something on you guys thinking she can get away with it. She also could have said that comment just to show off to her friend. I hope things work out and the first time she goes against the court order/documents then get the police involved. That would be my only advice.

Rags's picture

Interestingly your new Judgement sounds extremely similar to the one that has been in place for my SS for more than 15yrs.

Both parties are responsible for half of travel for visitation. Our specifically states that each party is responsible to get the child to their location and that both parties are to be reasonable and flexible in making travel arrangements.

SS's visitation schedule with the SpermClan is 5wks-Summer, ~1wk Winter (We do the even and odd year swap that your Judge outlined. Even years from the day school is out until the 24th. Odd years from the 26th until the day before schools starts. It averages about 1wk per year).

CS review is allowed only every 2yrs. Though my Wife is the CP and receives CS the SpermClan are the ones that attempt regular reviews in an effort to get CS lowered.

Now that it is all outlined in a Judgement/Court Order you will find that holding BM accountable for complying will be much easier for you and DH. BM will likely end up spending some time in jail or paying fines for contempt if she does not pull her head out of her ass.

Best regards,

Success is rarely final. Failure is rarely fatal. It is character, courage and consistency of effort that count. Vince Lombardi (with some minor Rags modifications) To each according to their performance, screw Karl Marx. (Rags)

Everyones Interest's picture

That's great news. It's like she's had 3 strikes you're out...and is on the last 'out'.

I can imagine that it is irrtating that you have to continue to document and report, but hopefully (and by the sounds of your BM) it won't last long, and your SD will be safely in your family's custody.

Congratulations and good luck!!!