Ok a little back ground- DH and I met in 2006, SD was 7, we have lived together for almost the entire time, got married 3 years ago. We now have 1 year old DD. SD was living with her grandparents when DH and I got together- since then she has lived with us 2 years while her BM was in jail for drugs, etc. When BM got out, she took SD back to live with her and her parents. Last fall DH and I went through custody procedings for SD (BM and DH were never married and had a VERY rocky relationship).