when I met my first husband it took me 6 months to really feel connected and attached to him. I think I had a lot of issues though so it was more me than anything and that's why it took so long. After a year or so I knew I wanted to marry him. We stayed together 12 years. it was wonderful.

I just knew I wanted him. He was so wonderful to me and I felt so secure. Security feeling is what I needed and looked for. I wish I had followed my gut with now SO. I don't feel quite so secure with this one.

Been there done that..three times...Feelings will pass...dont marry potential.

I still believe it exists. It is not my DH. It was a guy in high school. We later were friends in college. I married my first husband because my soul mate was not ready. Once I married he looked all over for me. Once I divorced I found him. I knew he was my soul mate & he felt the same. Even his strict & very serious father told me once that he had never truly talked seriously about anyone except me. I had never even met his father. He told me on the phone. He was willing to not take a job out of college w/Andersen Consulting to be w/me. I loved him dearly and did not want to jeopardize his future. He married his ex-girlfriend and told me he would before doing so. He also told me he did not think he could be faithful to her. They married & I dated DH a yr later. The day I moved in w/DH he called to tell me he was getting a divorce. I told DH. DH was crushed. I couldn't hurt DH. So I stayed. He later moved out of state. I was ready to leave DH. I became pregnant & decided to stay. He came back because he wanted to be close to give us a try. It was too late.

There is no doubt in my mind that is the person I should have been with. I cannot hurt my son by leaving his father. He is now remarried w/2 kids. I saw him 2yrs ago & we both freaked. It was at a store we ran into each other.

I doubt we will ever be together.

I met my dh 5 years ago through online dating. When we first spoke on the phone, I felt drawn to him in a way I'd never felt before, and he told me later that he felt the same. We spoke on the phone for 2-3 hours every night and constantly texted/emailed for 2 weeks before we actually met, and we felt we'd known each other for years. We'd both had unhappy marriages with abusive spouses and I don't know whether that shared experience brought us closer, but the first time we met face to face we both knew we had something special and the chemistry between us was amazing. I couldn't believe how strongly I felt about him and was concerned that it was happening too quickly, but hoped that being a 40 year old divorcee rather than a naive teen meant I could trust my gut feeling. The first year we were together we had a distance relationship before he moved to be with me. We decided after 6 months that we wanted to get married but didn't actually get married till we'd been together 3 years, due to his ex deliberately stalling their divorce out of spite. Dh is definitely the love of my life and we want to spend the rest of our lives together, though I've had to accept being a custodial sm to his 3 boys which is very, very hard at times. There have been times when I've wondered wheher I should have ever got involved, specially when the kids' behaviour was at its worst due to bm's emotional abuse, but my love for dh outweighs any reservations about being a sm. The kids are growing up now and their behaviour has improved a million percent so things are a lot less stressful than they were the first couple of years we were together.

DH and I are soulmates. It was something I'd always wanted but never found. I met him really soon after my divorce (although we had crossed paths before we later realized) and fell madly in love, the kind of couple who makes other people sick. We are so compatible in every way and share the same values. We almost never fight. I wish I'd known such a relationship could exist before settling in the past.

I know one thing, Your "soulmate" definitely DOES NOT come with previously enjoyed children; especially those who have an ex wife and previously enjoyed family to bollocks things up. I don't care HOW much you love HIM!!!

IF I believed in soul mates, DH would be mine. I've never connected to anyone so completely & never imagined that I could feel so whole. We didn't connect suddenly. It wasn't magical, & it wasn't "love at first sight", though there was an instant attraction. It didn't come without kinks & I don't believe we will ever know a life of bliss. But, I can't imagine feeling more in love with anyone.

We do all carry baggage. His comes in the form of 2 kids & an exW. I don't have kids but I do have a past, as we all do. I was in several abusive relationships before I met DH & struggled to learn how to trust someone. I've had to learn how to communicate my feelings with someone without being afraid of a physical reaction. While I'm carrying his load alongside him, he's carrying mine too.

I do remember the moment I realized I was in love with him. It was about 4 months into our relationship. I knew I wanted to marry him about 2 years after we started dating. We talked about it & while he was committed to me, he wasn't ready to even entertain the idea of marriage again. I felt I had to decide whether or not I'd stay, & I did. We were together for 8 years before he approached me about getting married, & we'll be married 2 years in September.