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Would anyone else feel a little uncomfortable about this?

giveitago's picture

Submitted by giveitago on Mon, 01/21/2013 - 6:21am

On a ride home DH is talking to the driver and he made mention of an ex girlfriend, while I was sitting in the middle of them. I think it is bad protocol. It does matter about the context of the conversation, I get that it was a comparative experience sort of tone to their conversation. I did not say a word, previously that day DH had managed to piss me off royally with some 'whatever' remarks and maybe I was overreacting, it's very possible, but it's really bad form to mention an ex, regardless of the experience with said ex, in front of your wife, surely? This was a complete stranger so he probably did not even think twice about it, I get that, but I felt embarrassed by the story DH related. It was like I was invisible to DH? Does anyone else think that 'male bonding' should be done out of earshot of wives?

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giveitago's picture

Submitted by giveitago on Mon, 01/21/2013 - 7:30am

I do not mention ex's, they are EX! I have more respect for current people than to bring ex's into a conversation. Maybe that's just me? I ignore when BM is mentioned, because she is so seldom mentioned in a positive light. I think a lot of it was to do with discovering something about DH in front of a total stranger? Also about being, literally, stuck in the middle of a male conversation. I would have considered more general topics to be appropriate for conversation with a driver. I felt uncomfortable and embarrassed.

NoWireHangers's picture

Submitted by NoWireHangers on Wed, 01/23/2013 - 11:15am

Sometimes my husband and I mention our ex's because they are part of our pasts and we did things in our lives that they were a part of. I'm not sure of the complete context of how your husband brought this up, so maybe in your case it was wrong of him to do this, and if he was doing it to intentionally hurt you because you argued early, then shame on him!

It's not part of our regular daily conversations, but yes, ex's come up and are mentioned. For example, I lived with an ex-bf for 2 years. While I lived with him, we remodeled the kitchen. I have mentioned to my husband the things that my ex and I did when remodeling our kitchen - some of the things we did on our own instead of hiring a contractor, some of the design ideas we came up with, etc. Ex's are part of our pasts and I don't think that it's ALWAYS a bad thing if they are brought up in a conversation. I've never been offended when my husband has done it and I don't think he's ever been offended when I've done it.