We dealt with the same stuff when my SD was 13-15. It was hell.

If you have good insurance, multiple visits to the emergency room can help that. Instead of getting what she wants, she sits in the ED waiting to be evaluated for hours and hours. Of course, you do, too, so it's not for the faint of heart.

Also, be sure to take the door off of her room (for "safety") and monitor all of her phone/social media posts (for "safety").  No, you can't spend the night at your friend's house because you are suicidal and unsafe.  When she says she will kill herself, the police are called to assess her and possibly take her to the hospital.

In other words, take it deadly seriously, even though it isn't - every time.  She'll get tired of it. If it doesn't get her what she wants but instead gets her more restrictions, it takes away her power.

Feral Forger SD20 used to do that when I first met her at around 15.5 and would write things in journals. They ALWAYS coincided with her being in trouble for something. Last year she moved in with her mother and they have been arguing CONSTANTLY, about cleaning and money and just recently about her stealing checks and every single time she starts talking suicide. Her younger sister is really tired of it. Thankfully I am out of it.

But just recently Feral Forger wrote on instahoax about her suicidal "thoughts". Munchkin SD13 showed it to me.

She said that "she isnt actively looking to kill herself, just that she doesnt really care about her own safety and is depressed all the time because of trauma to her "littler self".

Munchkin basically called it all BS.

my SD got in trouble and her phone taken away so she threatened suicide at school . She thought it would get her phone back but instead it got her baker acted. She got to ride in the back of the cop car to the mental institution and got to wear scrubs and someone had to watch her poop and pee for 3 days . 

I have 2 teenage sons,14 and 16.  They know better.

FIL committed suicide.  We lost a damn good friend last November to veteran suicide.

SD23 is mentally ill and untreated as far as I know (Definite diagnosis of bipolar at 18). Her suicide threats started at age 11 because we wouldn't let her dress like a trashy baby hooker. We went through therapists, psychologists and the Baker act.  The last time she was Bakered, I called the cops out.  One of them commented that it was the first time he'd seen a mother not bawling.  I told him I wasn't her mother and that I was cried out. Last tour was a 4 month stay in a residential treatment facility.  She was a note writer, email sender, and a self injurer.

DH has major depression.  When his meds quit working,  he tells me and his gun gets put away.  We both have concealed carry permits, so one or both of us carry.

All of the above are why my boys don't play that shit.

My brother committed suicide when I was 13.  I think for anyone to use suicide as a manipulative technique is utterly disgusting and despicable and I would come down like a ton of bricks on anyone in my family who used this as a way to get what they wanted.  And you can be sure it would not work with me. 

SD's brother and sisters do it.  Her brother is in his late 20's now and still holds BM hostage by saying it.  

I dated a guy before DH that had 2 girls.  Once they were around  11 or 12 they would say it.  The youngest cost him A LOT of money.  She had no intentions to do so but she knew exactly how to pull his chain.  She would threaten CPS for child abuse. She was the kid that would bruise herself and tell CPS that he hit her.  When he received full custody of her, I dropped him like a hot potato.  It is A LOT easier to deal with that type of drama from a distance.

My cousin has two teenagers from a previous marriage.  His son is the same age as SD, 17.  His child does this as well.  He has been in and out of the mental ward and group homes a lot. 

My youngest BS was bullied at school when he was around 11 or 12 years old.  I didn't know about it at the time and  he told me he wanted to kill himself.  I tried not to over react (it was VERY hard).  We had a LONG talk and I took him to a counselor.  The counselor is the one that helped us see that it was because of the bullying.   We (his BD and myself) helped him through it.  I assured him that he could talk to me about ANYTHING and that my main job was to protect him.  We changed schools, not once but twice during the course of a year.  He is now 21 and hasn't said or showed any signs  that he wants to kill himself since then.

My BS is an easy target for bullies because of his high functioning autism.  When SD and my cousin's son threaten to do it, it makes me so upset.  

My cousin told me that he has to take his son seriously or his son will tell the school counselor.   Once he tells the school counselor, CPS is called and my cousin has to deal with them.  CPS assumes kids do not lie or manipulate adults about suicide.  It has cost my cousin a great deal of money.  

I align with what tog redux stated.

That said, my 70-something year old FIL plays the “I don’t want to live anymore” (in a suicidal manner of speaking) card at least every few months with my MIL. 

It comes across VERY attention-seeking, to me. But, who’s to say? I take it seriously and adjust my life accordingly to said statements.

And my MIL and FIL don’t understand why I’m so harsh with my FIL CANNOT GET BEHIND THE WHEEL OF A CAR WITH MY TWO LITTLES - EVER rule.

There was a run of suicides at my SD'd high school while she was there.  Instead of increasing her compassion, she decided to turn it inot essentially a cottage industry pf crying wolf for fun and profit.  She had both of her parents running themselves ragged trying to please her at all times for a good year.  I don't want to even think of the amount of money spend on clothes and hair and nails and any knicknack to which she pointed.  She chose all movies, restaurants, and activities or a meltdown ensued.  I, of course, was a monster for pointing out that she was abusing their natural concern.  It was not until her brother cracked "I really wish she would get it over with so that I can get some peace and quiet around here" that it finally sunk in with DH.  He still gets keyed up occasionally when she "drops hints" but has learned to recognize that they always come when her car insurance bill is due, she is behind on some other bill, or right around a gift giving holiday.

It is really embarassing that she is so self-centered as to do this given that she was close enough to witness the grief and devastation that suicide of a young person leaves behind.  It shows her complete lack of introspection and compassion.

DH and I haven’t heard SD mention suicide lately. She also mentioned it around times we didn’t agree with something she said or she was being disciplined. 

She’s been in and out of counseling since the divorce (she was 7 going on 8). The counseling was first to help her cope with the divorce. BM found the counselor through someone she knew and I felt like SD had an unhealthy relationship with her counselor. She would tell DH and I “counselor said this, counselor said that, my counselor said you’re not supposed to do that.” Luckily the counselor got a job somewhere else. SD has had two other counselors since then and I don’t think she liked them because they wouldn’t tell her what she wanted to hear. She said “counselors don’t do anything. My friend was suicidal and the counselor did nothing for her.” Mmmhmm. 

Before this last counselor DH and I tried to get her to the ER. She fought it so hard that DH was trying to carry her kicking and screaming to the car. I think BM finally came to pick her up and take her home saying she’d find her a counselor. Of course she dragged her feet, DH actually calling her out because she never called the place she said she did. 

We still take SD’s talk seriously, but we can tell she doesn’t mean it when she tries to avoid us helping her. And I don’t mean for that to sound cold hearted. I’ve had friends and family who have died by suicide. I know that it can still happen even after seeking professional help.